Tuesday, December 14, 2010

A comment from someone who visited our church

"attended an outdoor church service this morning. YES... it was cold, mostly due to the wind. I met a lot of nice, new friends. the last time I attended a sunday morning service... it was held in a large, beautiful, heated sanctuary. I tell you this: the wind this morning was warmer than the artificial, glossed-over, fancy congregation that embodies the ornate building." -A visitor to the Church at Oakwood.

Sunday, December 12, 2010

Thanksgiving Banquet Review!

The Sunday before Thanksgiving found the community of Oakwood alive with people, food, and a spirit of love and acceptance. City of Hope Outreach planned and organized a lunch for people inside and outside Oakwood.


There were many people impressed with effort from City of Hope and its volunteers. Gina, who once lived in Oakwood, said, “I really appreciate the work Phillip and CoHO are doing here.” Several people discussed how simply odd it seemed that a group would just give away so much food.

Before the meal began, the area was swarmed by volunteers from churches and ministries from the Conway area. “I volunteer here because I really enjoy making a difference and serving people and this is a great place to do so,” explained a volunteer from UCA’s Chi Alpha. He continued, “I plan to volunteer here again.” These volunteers served food in a buffet style line and also took it to people eating at tables.

Phillip Fletcher, the director of City of Hope Outreach, spoke about the presence of food in throughout the bible. From the passover feast to the last supper and finally the final marriage supper. He related these events to the lunch in Oakwood, saying that both would find believers of all backgrounds, regardless of social class, ethnicity or wealth. After delivering a powerful message, Phillip asked for blessing for the food and everyone ate.

As people began finishing their food, Nicolle Fletcher, announced and began reading people’s card board testimonies, their personal stories of conversion featuring a description of themselves before salvation on one side and after salvation on the other. Everyone clapped and cheered as signs we’re flipped delivering messages of, “Victim” to, “Victorious” and, “Addicted” to, “freed.”

The event came to a close with Phillip speaking again, this time on hope. He delivered a message laying out the need for God by all people, regardless of wealth, ethnicity or social class. Phillip closed in prayer and volunteers cleaned up, distributing all the leftover food they could.

Written by Brent Nelson









Sunday, December 5, 2010

Moments in the Word PART 2

Dear Friend,

If you were satisfied with the Heaven described in the last post, I would strongly encourage you to CHECK your salvation! 

If you can find satisfaction in anything at the end of this life other than CHRIST you are LOST!  The Heaven described in the last post is HELL!  I know you are saying, "Seriously how could one describe hell with all the natural pleasure that were noted in that description?"  Simply put, it was void of Christ!

What was lost in the Garden of Eden after Adam and Eve sinned?  They lost God! Not that God could not find His way to them but their sin caused a separation between man and God.  In that separation they were punished.  They had life without God/Christ.  Christ was in the beginning with God and in deed was God (that was a sidebar). Christianity without Christ is just a bunch of "good morals" that will lead you to Hell.

Heaven is about CHRIST! Let's paint a new picture...

If you walk into the gates of Heaven and hear the words, "Well, done my good and faithful servant." Then you walk into what seems like a throne room and the only thing there is God the Father and Christ on His right hand. 

Would you be satisfied? 

Is Christ enough for you?

Sincerely,
Nicolle

Monday, November 29, 2010

Moments in the Word

Would you describe Heaven? 
What does it look like? 
What does it feel like? 
Who is there? 
What color are the streets? 
What does your room look like? 
How many jewels on your crown?
What questions do you have?
What are you most thrilled about? 
Is it that your spouse is there with you?
Maybe your father, mother or grandparent?

What are you most looking forward to in Heaven?

My friends I want you to take this time and ask yourself these questions, then answer them.  You don't have to do it here, but I do want you to take this time and think on what is being asked. I hear people all the time say when I get to Heaven I'm going to ask God this or that.  Have you ever heard or said this, "I can't wait to get to Heaven to see my (family or friend)"?

Let's think a little harder....

What if Heaven was this.....

You with no sickness, and with all the friends you ever had on earth, and all the food you ever liked, and all the leisure activities you ever enjoyed, and all the natural beauties you ever saw, all the physical pleasures you ever tasted and experienced.  There were no human conflict or any natural disasters.
Could you be satisfied with Heaven if it were just like this?

To be continued.......

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Titus Twosday!

This Titus Twosday is all about discipleship.  As I read through Titus it is clear to me that we need to be (being) discipled while discipling.  I as a 34 year old married woman with three children, I need to have disciples.  According to Titus 2, I need to be training younger women to love their husband and children, to be self controlled, pure, working at home, kind and submissive to their own husbands that the word of God may not be reviled.  The command to train the younger from this text is directed to married women with children. 

So to the MARRIED Woman with children...FIND, Create and carve out time to train younger women in this role.  We can not neglect the God given right and role to speak direction into the lives of younger women.  People we are always discipling whether it is intentional or not.  I am encouraging you today to make it intentional that the word of God may not be reviled.

Monday, November 1, 2010

Monday's Ministry Moments

This weekend was amazing, we listening to a missionary from Romanian share about the work they are doing, held a Nehemiah Project with Chi Alpha of UCA to decorate the inside of the Hope Community Center, held the World Banquet and a Community Lunch.  That was a whole lot to type.  :)

On Friday we got the room set up for the World Banquet.  During the set up for the World Banquet I personally learned how important it is to work together.  There was a song released years ago called "I need you to survive" by Hezekiah Walker this truth was made real in my heart as my sister in Christ.   Daspri took a huge load off my shoulders by carrying a huge load for this event.  She took the day off work to help me.  While I do know that her service to me was really her service to the Lord but we see Christ through one another.  I saw Christ in her this weekend.  I want to say thank you to her for all the hard work.  I would also fall short if I did not thank all the hands and feet that were there on Friday for set up and Saturday for breakdown.  The many staff, volunteers, friends, and family that just offered a helping hand in whatever means necessary.  THANK YOU!

Later that night we listened to a Romanian Missionary share his story and what they are doing there.  It was crazy as Phil and I sat and listened to him.  It was as if I were listening to Phil or myself speak about the City of Hope Outreach.  That time with him confirmed our mission here in Conway. The spirit of the Lord is with us and is doing this type of work in the earth.  We are apart of Kingdom expansion and I am so very grateful!

Saturday came very quickly after the late night on Friday.  Men and women woke up and hit the ground running to serve the community.  We painted the inside of the Hope Community Center (HCC).  We also painted the trim on the outside, put pictures up and on the wall, and organized the office.  It now looks amazing.  Since the upgrade we are better able to serve the community.  This will just help us to function a lot smoother.  A huge thank you goes to Chi Alpha for the work they put in on this project.  Also, Cory Nelson the Nehemiah Project coordinator for CoHO. 

Later that afternoon was the massive labor to bring awareness about the poor in our city and our world.  The World Banquet was a success from my viewpoint.  I believe men and women to include those working for the event were enlightened.  It was a blessing for both Phil and I to share this event with others.  A huge thank you to everyone who made this evening possible.  Special Thanks to Jennifer Mouser for laboring from 6am - 9pm in service to City of Hope Outreach.  You are an amazing woman!

We wrapped this weekend up with a Community Lunch with the Church at Oakwood.  We enjoyed a wonderful day of fellowship, food and fun.  Thank you to Christ Church Conway for supplying the meal and fellowshiping with us.

Thank you to everyone...

It is my prayer that your labor this weekend will prove to serve the King of Kings.  I pray that each one of you will see in each other the what God sees in you.  It is our goal to educate and mobilize believers towards true religion (caring for the poor, orphaned and widow), helping them to focus on their Jerusalem, Judea, Samaria and the ends of the earth.

Sunday, October 31, 2010

Upcoming Events

Saturday November 6, 2010 we will be having another Nehemiah Project.  For this Nehemiah Project we will be making rounds through the Oakwood Mobile Home Park to rake leaves and clean around the outside of peoples trailers.  We will have the largest part of our effort cleaning the cement slab that King's Club is normally held.  The cement slab is very large and often has debre, trash and broken glass.  We are making it our priority to clean the area to create a safe environment for our children to all play.

Then following that project we will have King's Club for the children of the community to come out a play.  It promises to be an amazing day.

If you would like to join this Nehemiah Project please contact Cory at nehemiah@cityhopeoutreach.com  if you are interested in serving with King's Club please contact Jared or Liz at kings@cityhopeoutreach.com

Thanks

Continued Picture Show

Family October 2010

My Mother Julia Kollmyer and I

extended family photo 2010



New & Old Family Pictures!

December 2007

October 2010
Fall 2009

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

3 R's Tutoring Needs more TUTORS!










We have run into a problem.  It is one of the problem we like to have though.  We have had an increase in the number of students needing tutoring.  Therefore, we could use some assistance.  If you think you would like to serve with us in tutoring children who need it please contact us at tutor@cityhopeoutreach.com


Tutor a child today!

Marriage Talks: New Podcast

My King (Phillip Fletcher) and I have started a conversation series on marriage.  It is called "Marriage Talks".  These conversations between Phil and I are frank, open and direct.  

This particular conversation began with my husband asking, "What are big sin issues for women?  You hear people all the time talk about men in pornography but you don't hear about a woman's struggle."

So, please enjoy our very first discussion about the struggles men and women face.  Click here to listen.
Feel free to comment.

Monday, October 25, 2010

World Banquet is SATURDAY OCTOBER 30, 2010


World Banquet 2010

So you are asking what in the world is the World Banquet?  Well, allow me a few moments of your time to explain.

The World Banquet is an experiential dinner.  You will randomly be immersed into a specific people group from these areas North America, Latin America,  Europe, Africa, South Asia and East Asia. 
As our night progresses you will experience a traditional meal from the culture you are experiencing.  You will not go from culture to culture to experience their world.  Just the one you are selected to attend, with your eyes you will see and feel the emotions from what others are experiencing.  You will immediately be surprised by the distinctions.  We will have music and dancing from some of the cultures.  There will be a few live bands sharing music from the Isaiah 58 Project. Really and truly this in a night you don't want to miss.  

This is an awareness evening.  Your eyes will be enlightened!  

Tickets are currently on sale at the Christian Book Outlet (Conway Commons), Hope Community Center, Chi Alpha of UCA (see Jennifer Mouser), www.cityhopeoutreach.com or reply here and I can help you get tickets.  The price is $25 for adults and $15 for students.   Ticket sales END at MIDNIGHT TUESDAY OCTOBER 26, 2010.  If you would like to attend but can not purchase your ticket until later in the week please notify me and we can reserve a ticket for you.  All proceeds go to directly benefit the poor in the City of Conway. 

We are on Facebook under City of Hope Outreach.

Again,

The World Banquet...See & Experience the cultures of the world
Saturday October 30, 2010 @ 6:30p-9:00p
Peace Lutheran Family Life Center
800 S. Donaghey
Conway, Arkansas 72034
501-499-1043 for more information


God IS!

I want to make it clear how wonderful and amazing our God truly is.  It isn't really because my life is perfect and everything is going great, but it is because of WHO God IS! 
God IS......

HOLY
RIGHTEOUS
JUST
THE JUSTIFIER
HUMBLE
MIGHTY
STRONG                      
WARRIOR
TO BE FEARED
CREATOR 
PROVIDER
PEACE IN A TIME OF STORM
HEALER
SHEPHERD 
SELF EXISTING
ALL SUFFICENT
MOST HIGH
THE ONE WHO SEES
THERE
REST

Shall I go on? If you have a characteristic of God to add to this list please do so.  If you have time share how God showed up in your life through that specific characteristic do that too.  If you have scriptures that will also help us to encourage each other.

Some pictures from California! June 2010

This is my mother and dad (step father)

My oldest sister and her daughters!  The Chocolate Beauties!  :)

My nephew and girlfriend.  He is the son of my oldest sister Chocolate beauty!

My girls with my father

My Mother and I




Friday, September 3, 2010

What's Happening Now

Okay so seriously I have not had time to breathe!  I know that doesn't sound like a good thing but let me tell it is.  As far a ministry is concerned God is jumpin off some huge events!  We have been working for sometime now to establish a trailer in the community.  It would serve as the community center were tutoring, counseling, bible study, meetings and feedings would be held.  Well, that mobile home was moved into the park on Wednesday.  It is so wonderful.  We still have a lot of work to do inside the mobile home.  We need your help to do it.  We are scheduled for a renovation project on September 11, 2010.  In order to accomplish that work we need $2,000.00.  I know without a shadow of a doubt that we can raise those funds in a matter of days.  Why am I so confident?  Well, only because of the God I serve.  He has been consistent in meeting our needs.  He does own everything!  Remember.  It would be awesome if you would like to donate through our website www.cityhopeoutreach.com in order to help us accomplish the goal of having a facility in the community that can be used for the glory of God and the joy of people.  Friends we are apart of building the Kingdom for God!  It is an amazing opportunity.  Join us in this effort.  You can also purchase a Home Depot Gift Card in any amount and that will be used towards the renovation of the community center in Oakwood Village Mobile Home Park. 

Next...

The Lord laid on my husband's heart to establish a shelter.  This Hope Shelter would serve as immediate shelter for our community.  At this point there isn't an immediate emergency shelter.  So with lots of prayers and believing God for provision and direction we shared that vision at our Appreciation Banquet in July.  We the God we serve is abundant is blessing and clear with His plans.  One week ago today we were offered 1.33 acres of land and a 20,000 sq. ft facility to serve as the Hope Shelter.  By offered I mean donated without charge as long as the Gospel will be proclaimed and the work of the Lord will continue.  So, uh YES!  That is what we are about.  We currently have two grants in for renovations of that facility.  We will also be raising funds and partnering with businesses and people to make that vision come to full fruition.  So when you pray please pray for that effort in every way that you can think of.  We are blessed but need your prayers. 

So....

That is just the half.  I will give more updates soon.  Here is a look at the upcoming events calendar.

September 11, 2010 Nehemiah Project Community Center Renovations  (get involved by donating finances, time, materials and labor)

September 18, 2010 God, Gospel and Poverty Seminar

September 24-26, 2010 Immersion  (40 Hours of Intense Immersion in Poverty)

September 26, 2010 Community Lunch with First Baptist Church in Conway

October 30, 2010 World Banquet (tickets on sale September 15, 2010 see website for more details)

November 21, 2010 Thanksgiving Banquet

December 6-10, 2010 Christmas Store

These are current major events.  Reply to this post, FB, email or check out the website for more details on any one of these events.  Thanks




Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Do you remember?

Do you remember when I said I had all this stuff to say?  Well, that fact is still true.  However, I have not found the time to sit and share all my thoughts with you.  It has been hard for me to sit still (not because I don't want to) because life is moving at a very rapid pace for us.  So seriously, check back because I do have lots to share.

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Titus Twosday! Mothering to the best of your ability!

Do you remember these, Titus Twosday's?   Well, I thought we'd just jump back into our old routine with new thoughts and ideas.  This Titus Twosday is all about motherhood.  Over the last year I have discovered new things about myself, Christendom (if that is a word), parenting and children.  My now 11 year old son, 9 year old daughter and 8 year old daughter have taught me many things and helped shape my opinion on life in general.  Last year about this time I was on the road to homeschooling my middle daughter for the very first time.  I was full of excitement and nervous anxiety.  I wondered would I really be able to help her, teach her and train her in the things she most needed.  I had a friend (Angie) holding my hand and encouraging me the whole way.  She helped me to see how I was really the best teacher of all things my daughter could ever learn.  While, that knowledge brought great comfort it also brought great responsibility.  I realized if I did not teach it, it wouldn't be taught.  I know most you are thinking DUH!  But seriously that is SCARY!  During this past year of schooling I had to learn to trust the Lord with the wisdom I would need in order to educate my daughter to the best of my ability.  And so there you have it a successful year of homeschool completed in the Fletcher home.  I can't honestly say my daughter is a brain scientist.  I can't even say she is ahead of "the class".  Here is what I can say.  I know my daughter and she knows me!  She knows exactly what I would say and do in almost any situation.  That goes both ways.  She is a professional business woman called to urban missions.  She can hold a meeting at Starbucks, Stoby's, Tropical Smoothie, the trailer park, the United Way Services Center, Birth Works Doula Services Center, Conway Regional Gym, local Churches and home any day of the week.  She can self entertain.  She is confident in her math skills, she enjoys reading (only good books according to her), she can communicate her needs to others, she is more outgoing, she cares for others, she loves to cook and clean, she has the heart of a servant, she is a nurturer, she loves babies, she is a great swimmer, she loves zumba and enjoys woman topics (puberty, development, baby's and how they are born).  Did you have to wonder where she got "woman topics" from?  I am laughing out loud about that one.   Anyway, all that to say I was able to really know and learn my daughter this year.  As I said before she was able to learn more about me and my heart.  It was an awesome adventure I was literally able to pour my heart into my daughters heart.  That is amazing! As I say all of those wonderful things this next statement is probably going to shock you.

I will not be homeschooling any of my children this coming school year.  They will all attend the local public school and I am looking as forward to that as I was to homeschooling Najee' last year.  Okay, so the big fat WHY!  As I look back I see so many victories but I also see what was lost in the process for me.  I had one child in the elementary school (2nd grade), one at home (3rd/4th grade), and the other about 5 miles away at the intermediate school (5th grade).  Not only that, we (my husband and I) were experiencing for the first time in our lives running and operating a non profit from the ground up and establishing a church plant.  Those things were all major in and of themselves, however I will continue with the list of new beginnings.  I recieved my Certification as a Doula for Central Arkansas, which meant I was being called away at any given time to a birth or to meet the needs of a laboring momma.  I was answering prenatal and post pardum questions.  Have I even begun to talk about ministry issues and concerns?  Do you get the picture? 

So the title of this post is "Mothering to the best of your ability", I was only successful this last year because of Christ.  Seriously, no joke! I was able to mother to the best of my ability given the previous situation.  In retrospect I could or should have given more to particular areas.  I visited my other children at their school, oh about twice the whole school year.  Now if you know me that is NOT how I roll!  I usually visit my childrens school at the very least once per week!  I was tired all the time.  When the other children came home from school I was not the mother they were used to.  I was tired, grumpy, busy, on the phone, rushing, shall I go on?  Anyway, as my husband and I were looking into this coming school year I realized two things.  This is advice for all women everywhere!  If you are going to homeschool consider homeschool all of your children, not just one or two.  Life is much easier if you are calling all the shots and not calling some and then trying to work around other people calling shots too.  I also struggled with field trips.  I wanted my kids in public school to attend the field trips I was taking Najee on, but she could not attend the ones they were going on.  So what happened was the public school kids got to go on every single adventure there was and Najee' did her field trips with the sibilings on the weekends.  That was sad, I know.  The second piece of advice is if you are a better mother to your children while they attend public school then if they are homeschooled allow them to attend public school.

I know we talk about the influence of the world on our children when they attend public school but really if we as parents are actively training and discipling our children the influence of the public school will pale in comparision to the influence you have as a parent.  I think Christiandom does a disservice to mothers and children by implying that the only way to teach our children Christian values is to homeschool often at the expense of good being a godly influence.  I hope I am making myself clear.  If homeschooling your children means you are a stress ball of crazy all day and night, then DON'T DO IT!  Because in that process you are teaching your children who Christ and how they should behave.  I would much rather release the homeschool concept and idea to better educate and equip my children for service in the Kingdom of God.  Now that is my story. 

I am not opposed to homeschool in the future.  However, I will make huge changes.  The first of which will be homeschooling all three of my children at one time.  The second would be not homeschooling during the onset of major life transitions.  You will all be happy to know (or at least I am happy to know) that we now have a wonderful group of servants in ministry what will share lots and lots of the load that Phil and I were carrying alone.  So Praise the Lord for it all!  Better mothering is already in progress, because God is providing so we can keep first things first!

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Oh Me, Oh My I'm back online

Well, it feels like it has been years since we were last together!  :)  I have been super busy but the biggest part was that my computer was actin' a plum FOOL!   So, my wonderful husband had my friend (the computer) checked out and she is doing well now.  I have lots to say however it will not be now.  I just wanted to say hello since I'm back in cyberspace with my own working computer!  YAY!

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

HOME ALONE (just my husband and I)

My kids are at camp for a whole week!  WOW!  I can't believe it!  We dropped them off on Sunday after church and will pick them up on Friday evening.  I think we are all holding up pretty well!  Phil and I are really enjoying our time to hang, discuss, work and plan.  I praise God for this time and look forward to their safe and richly blessed return. 

This is the first time we have allowed our children to participate in something like this that we were don't directing, teaching or whatever.  We fully trust this ministry and in fact they are new partners in ministry with the CoHO.  You can check them out.  It is a non profit organization that pulls together once per year to put on this camp for "unchurched, poor, abused and broken children".  The work is super awesome and right up our alley!  There is a huge mix of children and every child is received with open arms and are fully nurtured at whatever stage of life they are in.  I love it!
 Check them out www.campcayc.org

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Interesting!

I just realized I have left all my friends in the blogging world high and dry.  My last post was about me realizing that I need more time with the Lord.  God is very ..... I don't have words.  Whatever word I would find would be positive but words fail in describing the greatness of God most times.  The day after posted Honesty I received an email asking me to speak to a group of young moms (MOPS) about how much time in the word a woman in leadership needs in order to lead effectively.  REALLY!?  I thought why in the world would the Lord send someone to ask me that when I am struggling with that very thing.  Then I realized the answer was simple. 

There is not a recipe for your commitment level.  I would never tell a woman to read her bible three times per day and pray to the west at high noon laying flat on the floor before the Lord and then you can effectively minister to others.  Far from it!  I would and did encourage the woman and myself to keep a steady flow of in pour as you pour out.  Does that make sense?  I used the illustration of three jars.  One of those jars is you, the other is family, friends and people you serve in ministry, then the final jar is Christ.  I filled the Christ jar and the you jar up with water.  Then I discussed everyday scenario.  For instance you homeschool, your husband has a hard day at work, your kids need emotional direction and support, your girlfriend calls and her life seems to be crumbling before her eyes, one of the ladies in your church needs help (simple advice) and finally a girl in your neighborhood is struggling with some serious issues and wants to talk to you about it.  By the end of that day your jar should pretty much be empty.  However if you keep a slow steady flow from the cup of Christ your cup will never run out.  We have to understand that His cup will never run empty but ours will.  For mothers with small children or even older children with tons of activities going on it is hard to get time to be in your prayer closest for hours on end.  I encouraged these ladies and myself to sing songs of praise and worship while washing dishes, listen to a sermon on the internet while folding clothes, pray as you go and on the way.  I absolutely believe we need to take purposeful time to spend with the Lord but when we become legalistic about it, it turns from worship and fellowship to duty.  There is no joy in duty.

So I am thankful to the Lord for presenting me with that opportunity and realization.  I need Him consistently but it doesn"t have to look like three hours in the prayer closet while your children are tearing up the whole house outside your door.  Different seasons of live require different and creative ways to maintain a steady flow of Christ into our hearts.

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

HONESTY!

Where are you struggling in your walk with Christ right now? 


I chose this topic because I am struggling to faithful pursue the Lord in scripture.  I am frustrated with individuals around me who don't know the truth of scripture yet I am having the hardest time sitting down to rest in God's word.  While visiting family in California I watched an episode of "Wife Swap".  I learned so much, and felt so much shame as well.  One of the moms was a belly dancer who spent her life belly dancing.  She had belly dancing students come to her home and clean the house while she danced or meditated.  She had a symbol of every faith system in her home because she did not want to be wrong about any one of them, and be overlooked by one.  Okay so enough of the back ground.  Here is the point.  This woman who is hopeless, lost and blind to the truth takes time everyday for one hour to pray/breath/summon spirits/whateva!  But, I am struggling to find time to read the word?  WHAT!  I have the eternal hope of glory.  I am in relationship with the King of Kings, the Alpha and Omega.  I have been blessed to be called a child, a joint heir to the throne with Christ and I can't find time to study.  That show slapped me in the face so hard I can still feel the sting even now.  Therefore, I must be honest and say I am without and lacking.  My prayer is that the conviction of the simple show will bring me to a place of repentance and restoration in the area of study and resting in the joy of the Lord once again.

There you have it, my struggle.  What is yours?  If you are not currently struggling through anything would you be kind enough to leave a prayer for me and or others in the comment section of this post.  Let us build on another up in the faith of Christ! 

Monday, July 5, 2010

Ignorance!

I recently heard some information that absolutely floored.  Understand that there is not much out there that floors me.  Lots of things disappoint, frustrate or break my heart.  However, flat out floored me not often.

Okay so many of you may know that I have taken a firm stand on inter racial dating and marriage.  For a many number of reasons.  With that being said there is always the exception to the rule. 

My friend a native Conwayian.  Is that how you spell that?  Is that even the right word choice?  Oh, I hope so.  Anyway, we were talking about a friend of ours who is married inter racially.  They were seeking church membership here in town and the pastor told them that they did not allow that in their church.  The pastor  went on to say that it was sinful for them to be together.  The scripture they used...Do not be unequally yoke.  WHAT!?!?!?!

Let's actually take some time to look at the verse in context.

2 Corinthians 6
1Working together with him, then, we appeal to you not to receive the grace of God in vain. 2For he says, "In a favorable time I listened to you, and in a day of salvation I have helped you."  Behold, now is the favorable time; behold, now is the day of salvation. 3We put no obstacle in anyone’s way, so that no fault may be found with our ministry, 4but as servants of God we commend ourselves in every way: by great endurance, in afflictions, hardships, calamities, 5 beatings, imprisonments, riots, labors, sleepless nights, hunger; 6 by purity, knowledge, patience, kindness, the Holy Spirit, genuine love; 7by truthful speech, and the power of God; with the weapons of righteousness for the right hand and for the left; 8through honor and dishonor, through slander and praise. We are treated as impostors, and yet are true; 9as unknown, and  yet well known; as dying, and behold, we live; as punished, and yet not killed; 10 as sorrowful, yet always rejoicing; as poor, yet making many rich; as having nothing, yet possessing everything. 11We have spoken freely to you, Corinthians; our heart is wide open. 12You are not restricted by us, but you are restricted in your own affections. 13 In return (I speak as to children) widen your hearts also.
The Temple of the Living God
14 Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? 15 What accord has Christ with Belial? Or what portion does a believer share with an unbeliever? 16What agreement has the temple of God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God; as God said, "I will make my dwelling among them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they shall be my people. 17Therefore go out from their midst, and be separate from them, says the Lord, and touch no unclean thing; then I will welcome you, 18 and I will be a father to you, and you shall be sons and daughters to me, says the Lord Almighty."

To be unequally yoked has nothing to do with ethnicity.  Even in the old testament when the Israelites were told not to have any deals with other ethnic groups it was not because of their skin but because of their faith or lack there of.  We don't live in such a way that our ethnicity predetermines our faith. 

I guess me explaning all of this is because I am trying to give this pastor the benefit of the doubt but there really isn't one.  Churches around this world are preaching and teaching IGNORANCE!  Not all but a few.  Those small often have great impact on the ones who would be damaged the most by it...unbelievers!  The bottomline is whatever your preference is regarding this issue, understand it is your preference and not a sin issue.  Sin is the issue when two people chose to be married and do not agree on faith in Christ.  That is the true definition of being unequally yoked.  Don't believe me read the passage again for yourself.  Please Please don't continue to be ignorant and spread ignorance!   Read the scripture.  Most of all stop lying on God!
I would like to take a quick poll.  Tell me your age (if your not ashamed) and whether or not you were taught in ignorance or righteousness as a child growing up.  I would also like to know if this is the first time you have heard the scripture being twisted in this way or not.  Thanks for sharing with me.

Monday, June 28, 2010

Monday's Ministry

Her name is "Undesirable".  She has been raped by her father over and over.  She has given birth to one of her father's children and one by another man.  She can't keep her children because DHS has found her unfit as a mother.  All the while giving food stamps and government aide to her mother who is fully aware of what is happening between the father and the daughter.  The mother hates the daughter because she stole her husbands affection.  Now the daughter will sleep with anyone.  She has repeatedly slept with a man who she knows has an STD and is married.  Her siblings keep calling her stupid for being with him.  Her response is "Maybe I want to die and this is how I want to do it."  She has been in and out of juvenile jail.  She wears an ankle bracelet.  She was kicked out of school because of her pregnancy.  The administration at the school thinks of her as a whore.  Some days she wants to cry out and tell her story but if she does her mother will beat her within an inch of her life.  So she remains silence, and angry.  The hatred builds and builds. 

Undesirable is young....very young.  She is 16 years old.  By the worlds standard she is ugly.  She is fat, dirty, unkept in every way and uneducated.  She lives in an undesirable part of town, where drug abuse is ramped.  She is unseen and unheard everyday of her life.  She wonders everyday, "Why am I here? If there is a God would He be merciful and kill me, right here, right now?!"  Her exterior is hard and cold.  She will curse you up one way and down another.  She likes to fight people in the outside world because it is the only way she can relate to people.  It is the only way her mother, father and siblings relate to her.  She doesn't think there is anything good about her at all.  Her life is filled with hatred, bitterness and fear.

This Ministry Monday is about our responsibility to minister to "the undesirable".  The person described above is a picture of the many women with whom God has given me the opportunity to minister to.  Allow me to take a few moments to describe what ministry to this type of woman may look like.

The primary goal is to get this person to see, know Christ and find value in the person God created them to be.  However, the direct approach is not to walk up to this person and say.....Do you know Jesus?  or Here are the 10 commandments, how many of these have you broken?   You don't have to convince this person of their sin.  They are already aware of it.  They need to be convinced of God's love inspite of their sin.  Then you need to help them see the Hope that lies in Christ Jesus.  You will have to answer on some level the question of "Why me?"   This is a great work and will take years and years to address the many concerns.  Truth be told often you are not the person who gets to walk with that person in salvation.  In this raw stage you are actually tilling the grow.  Then you may plant a seed or two.  You may even be blessed enough to water.  It is always God who gives the increase and you may not get to see that happen.  That is were you have to be strong in your faith in Christ.

 Here is what I would say.  Offer the hope of Christ and address the immediate need.  Be consistent in their life, even if that means you get cursed out every time.  Prayer, prayer prayer is key.  We need to show this person the love they have never seen before in this life time.  A love not of this world.  Befriend Undesirable, enter into a relationship with her! 

Here is a challenge question: 
Why don't you engage in relationship with "Undesirable"? 
If you do have a relationship with Undesirable, What are the difficulties you experience? What are the joys?



Here are some ways you can help us to continue to minister and love "Undesirable".
This week begins King's Club during the week. 
Tuesday and Thursday @ 2:00pm-4:00pm in Oakwood
Still Match Funds for the Mobile Home....we still need 89 people to donate $35.00 to match funds for the mobile home.  We are also looking for 98 people to donate $15 to move the mobile home from its current location to the mobile home park.

Sunday, June 27, 2010

Back to Life!

Do you remember the song "Back to Life, Back to Reality, Back from the Fantasy...Yeah ah!"?  Well, if you do or don't that is my theme song as of this last week.  I was blessed to go to California with my mother and kids for two weeks.  We drive there and back.  Upon our return to Conway we hit the ground runnin'.  A seminar the next day, appointments with clients throughout the week, community service projects on and on.  California you were great but it is certainly back to life.  I actually need a few days vacation from my vacation and my life.  But, this is the reality that is mine.  Busy, busy up hill climb, then the plateau and down hill......of course to repeat it all over again. 

Basically I am writing today to say....."I'M BACK!"

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Titus Twosday! Modesty 2010 part 2

This Titus Twosday is all about modesty in 2010. Some of you read my previous post on this topic.  This time I really want to hear from you!  So if you have read this much of this post you have to comment!  DEAL! Okay I am going to ask some questions and you can answer any one of them or all of them.  That is your choice.  Here we go!!!

1.  What is most disturbing to you about people dressed immodest?
2.  How does immodesty effect you as a believer?  Do you have to pay special attention to guard your heart?  What are the specific ways in which you do that?
3.  Is there a general standard for everyone, or is there room for "if you got it flaunt it"?
4.  Do you think most people dressed immodestly are aware of their possible offense and disturbance...or more importantly that they may be lead another into sin?
5.  is there a limit to one individuals responsibility to..."not cause a brother to stumble"?  Example...someone in your church says it causes them to sin when you wear green.  You are completely covered but they are lead to sin because of some childhood deal.  What is your responsibility as a believer to help that other believer in their sin?


Okay I think that is enough for now.....


Here is a sneak peak at what we will be talking about in the next few weeks.
Can a woman be a missionary (outside the home) and have a family?  What is a woman's role in the command to go and make disciples? 


Excited to hear from you all!

Nicolle

Monday, June 7, 2010

Money Matching this Ministry Monday!

We Need Your Help


We have been blessed to purchase a mobile home trailer that will serve as the main center for the Oakwood Community. This trailer will be the primary location for 3R’s Tutoring, counseling, King’s Club and other activities to serve the Oakwood Community.

We were blessed to receive a donation of $3,500 for the purchase of the trailer and we will need to match these funds. How can you help?

We are looking for 100 people to donate $35 towards this facility. I am personally asking that you would be a part of this endeavor as we continue to bring hope to our city of Conway and specifically here in Oakwood. You can donate securely online through our website at www.cityhopeoutreach.com You can also mail in your donation to:

The City of Hope Outreach, P.O. Box 11474 Conway, Ar. 72034
In the memo section please specify, “Trailer”

All donations are 100% tax deductible. The City of Hope Outreach is a 501(C)3 faith-based nonprofit ministry incorporated in Arkansas.

Thank you sincerely for your donation and time.
Nicolle
The City of Hope Outreach

Monday, May 31, 2010

Memorial Day!

Memorial Day is a United States federal holiday observed on the last Monday of May. Formerly known as Decoration Day, it commemorates U.S. men and women who died while in the military service. First enacted to honor Union soldiers of the American Civil War (it is celebrated near the day of reunification after the Civil War), it was expanded after World War I.

Here is a video and song for you to be still and reflect on your freedom today!  You have heard it time and time again FREEDOM IS NOT FREE!  Salvation is not free!  Christ PAID for your salvation! 

Please remember MEN AND WOMEN ARE PAYING FOR YOUR FREEDOM EVERYDAY!

I want to say thank you to the men and women that serve this country!

I want to say thank you for the wives and husbands who scarifice every day for our freedom. 

Thank you for enduring long nights away from home.  The repeat tours overseas.  The years you miss of the lives of those you love the most.  The moms thank you for being strong!  Thank you for building community around women and men that are waiting at home.  Thank you for praying.  Thank you for being strong when your spouse is not the same upon their return home.  Thank you for loving them.  Thank you for writing letters and sending care packages.  Thank you for your leadership! 

THANK YOU FOR BEING WILLING TO GIVE YOUR LIFE FOR SOMETHING GREATER THAN YOURSELF! 

THANK YOU MILITARY FAMILY FOR ALWAYS SUPPORTING EVEN IN THE MOST DIFFICULT SITUATIONS.

PRAISE THE LORD FOR MEN AND WOMEN WHO LOST THEIR LIFE IN BATTLE.  IT IS BECAUSE OF THEIR SCARIFICE THAT WE CAN BE FREE TODAY!

TO OUR SOLDIERS AND THEIR FAMILY I SAY THANK YOU FOREVER AND ALWAYS!

 

Please comment on this post and thank or remember a soldier by writing their name and if you would like add a special note about them.

Photobucket
To my husband (former) Captain Phillip Fletcher.....Thank you for every hard scarifice!  Thank you for the love you have for your family and those who serve alongside you.  Thank you for being strong enough to stand for something greater than yourself.  Thank you for being disciplined! I love you for being the man you are.  I thank God for what you and I both learned and experienced as a military family.  ARMY STRONG HOOAH!
 

Saturday, May 29, 2010

Funny Family Moments in the Fletcher House!

So Phil and I wanted to know what our children think about dating.  This conversation began by our children asking the question, "At what age will we be able to go to the movies with just our friends?"  Our answer was pretty simple.  We will not create a standard age for our children to do anything really.  It will depend on their independent level of responsibility, friends, obedience, the movie they want to see etc.  Basically it will be to our discretion and on a child by child basis!  That conversation lead into another.  The topic of dating.  Phil and I don't think we have come to a complete conclusion on the topic.  We have heard so much and simply are not sure which way to go with it.  We have talked about courting, arranged marriage, dating, banning all forms of contact between the opposite gender outside of parental relationship and on and on.  Phil has talked about polishing weapons and intimidating all males and I have threatened to ban all "chicken heads" from our house.  But what is a realistic expectation?  This is still a matter of prayer and praise the Lord that we still have time to wait and hear from the Lord.

In the meantime, Phil and I both know each one of our children have formed their own opinions about dating, courting and the rest.  So here are the results.

Our 11 year old boy says.....
Well the problem with dating is if people have sex, make out, or kiss.  So if you don't have sex, or make out or kiss people should be able to date at 10 years old.  Our question to him was, "Son, what would a person do with a boyfriend or girlfriend at the age of 10 years old?"  his response was they could hold hands outside of school. 

Then we have our youngest an 8 year old girl says.....
I think we should date at the age of 18!  She was very excited about her answer.  We are not sure if that is her true belief or if she just wanted to answer the question according to what we think would be a good answer.  She went on to explain that 18 was a good age because you should be going to college and have the high school stuff out of the way and your maturity is in place to date.

Finally our middle child a 9 year old girl says....
You have to date at the age of 16 years old.  Because you need at least 3-4 years to get to know a person before you marry them.  I will be married at 20.  She went on to say that she and her friend watched a show called, "Say yes to the dress" and she was 49 getting married for the first time.  Oh, my she was way too old to be getting married for the first time.  Who wants to be that old and getting married.  I mean you can't even have children then.  You body is starting to breakdown.  No, way man.  I want a boyfriend at 16 for my birthday gift! 

Okay people what do we say to these things!  I will admit a whole lot of laughter took place after that conversation.  However I thought it was good to hear what they think about these topic without spoon feeding them our thoughts and beliefs.  We certainly took the time to shape some of what was said, but even more so I had to examine my thoughts on a few things.

What is the appropriate age to allow your children to develop relationships with the opposite gender.  In some ways I feel like the rules are the same as the movie rules.  Phil had to look long and hard about Najee's thoughts and her 16th birthday request.  LOL But seriously!  Naj is my home schooled child, who has really learned this year about being a wife and mother.  So naturally her desire would be towards marriage and motherhood.  We are also currently in a sea of young people getting married at the age of 18-24 years old.  Even I got married at 21 years old.  I can see where that thought process came from.

I don't know.  What do you think?  What are you teaching your children about dating, courting and the opposite gender?  What is your philosophy about this topic with your kids?  Do you look at your dating experience and think it is something they should follow or is your experience something you want your children to avoid?  Let's chat about that.  I want to hear from you.

 

Friday, May 28, 2010

A Poem from my daughter Nichelle

Enjoy this lovely story by my daughter!  Please forgive all the family photos you will understand why I said that after you view it.  I just could not imagine using another person for the character references. 


Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Wednesday in the Word! Respect part 2

Last week I asked you to find scripture to help me on the road to understanding biblical respect.  I found a few and I will share them.  Then it is your turn.  There were some great comments last week, but I am still looking for scripture to back up our beliefs about respect.

I will begin by giving a pretty basic and secular definition:

1. To feel or show deferential regard for; esteem.

2. To avoid violation of or interference with: respect the speed limit.
3. To relate or refer to; concern.

n.
1. A feeling of appreciative, often deferential regard; esteem. See Synonyms at regard.
2. The state of being regarded with honor or esteem.
3. Willingness to show consideration or appreciation.
4. respects Polite expressions of consideration or deference: pay one's respects.
5. A particular aspect, feature, or detail: In many respects this is an important decision.

Based on this definition I believe we can look at Proverbs 1:8-9.  Hear, my son your father's instruction, and forsake not your mother's teaching, for they are a graceful garland for your head and pendants for your neck.  The scripture is calling children to have a deferential regard for the instruction that parents give. It is highlighted as adornment around their head and neck.

Romans 13:1-7 talks about respect to authorities.  It also highlights that authorities are not bad but good.  Authority seems bad to you when you go against it.  I will add here that men and women in power have a tendency to abuse that place and lord over people.  Which goes against the very purpose of authorities.

That brings me to my final point.  Then I would love to hear from you.  We see perfect love, respect and authority in the relationship of the Father and Christ.  Christ was in perfect submission to the Father. (John 6:35-40) It was the Father's will that Christ yielded to in everything.  Christ pointed to the Father in all things.  Then the Father turns around and points to the Son.  (John 1:33-34) What an awesome picture of love, respect and authority.  I see the scripture telling us we need all three working in concert.

What does that mean practically? To the mom and dad you have to carry your authority from a place of love and not power.  We have talked over and over about this in our home.  It is love and not power.  What do we naturally do and or think of those who use their power over you?  If you examine your heart, you will know without a shadow of a doubt that the forcefully powerful lose every time.  Let's take a second look at Christ.  Over and over He could have exercised His power but every time he displayed love.  Guess what that does?  It draws the loved person closer.  Their respect and love increases as a result.

Last week I was DONE!  Do you hear me DONE!  However my husband really walked our family through the truth of love, respect and authority.  When there is love, grace, patience, long suffering, gentleness and clearly defined expectations there will be respect.  You don't even have to fight for it.  There will be a natural out pour of respect.  I think last week I was ready to fight for respect.  I do mean fight! However, from the scriptures I see that love is how respect is gained.

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Titus Twosday "Modesty in 2010?!"

Take a journey with me as we talk about modesty as it relates to Christianity. I will say now if it hurts say “OUCH” and make the needed changes. If you are fine then encourage another woman to be more aware of her need to dress modestly. Okay, so you may be wondering where all this began.

About two days ago Phil was listening to a sermon by C.J. Mahaney about modesty. Then Saturday we went to Wild River Country (a water Park in Arkansas) for the day. After careful review of the scripture, the message (by CJ) and a close look at the world we live in I was horrified. I was horrified by the dress of others and at times my own dress. I will say when the topic of modesty is brought to the table women usually leave it at a condition of the heart. What is your motive in dressing this way or that? To that I agree and at the same time we have to take that a little further.

Look at some scriptures.

1 Timothy 2:8-10 (ESV)
8I desire then that in every place the men should pray, lifting holy hands without anger or quarreling; 9likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, 10 but with what is proper for women who profess godliness—with good works.


1 Peter 3:3-6 (ESV)
3 Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— 4but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. 5For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, 6as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.

Proverbs 11:22 (ESV)
22Like a gold ring in a pig’s snout
is a beautiful woman without discretion.

After the visit to the water park I was pretty much in shock. Young girls wearing those triangle string bikinis that not only showed the tops and sides of their breast but the bottom too! The list of things goes on and on for inappropriate attire. Since I listened to that message by CJ I could only think of the men who wanted to have a day of adventure with their families having to endure breast and butt in their face every where they turned. It doesn’t even end at the females. I can’t even count how many times I got a full moon shine from some guy wearing his swim shorts too low. Both genders are attempting to show as much as possible to as many people as possible. This breaks my heart. I have to ask why? What has happened in our world that is creating this type of monster? I should not be surprised. There is nothing new under the sun. Modesty seems to change depending on the time period. This is why I agree with an individuals dress being an issue of the heart, but what is the rest?

I will be honest and say for many years I just felt like if a guy has a lust problem he needs to seek the Lord about it. I should not have to cover my whole body only revealing my hands and face for his sake. My mind is changing. You could say my mind is being renewed! I don’t want to appear as an Amish woman or a prostitute. My desire is to dress as the scripture calls us…respectable and modest. The trouble is what does that look like. I did some research on the web and found many, many articles about modesty, even clothing websites were you can purchase modest apparel. Some I thought were way over the top. But could I just be a product of this culture and be missing the mark as well? There is a fine line between legalism and license. I will connect you with one of the websites that I personally found very helpful. It did not seem legalistic at all. It seems to serve as a guideline. I’ll post that later. Moving to the reason why I believe this is a problem in our culture.

I think several things have happened. Women have not been teaching the younger women as Titus 2 instructs. I also believe women have forgotten or misunderstood what truly makes them beautiful. It is not the outer beauty that is lasting but the hidden person of the heart. That is what God looks for in his daughters. This is what we should be reflecting to the world.

I stated earlier that there were some things I needed to change as well. I am busty. Anyone who has seen me is well aware of that fact. It can not be hidden from anyone. You might ask Nicolle, “Why are you making this statement while talking about modesty?” Why not? We all have to identify what about our body’s poses a stumbling block to the opposite gender. Then pay special attention when leaving the house that, that particular area is well covered or doesn’t command undue attention. Women you are designed with hills and valleys that are visually pleasing to men. The goal in that was not for you to turn every man’s head when you walk in a room but to turn your husbands head. Your body is for your husband, not every Tim, Terry and Tom. So toning things down in public is a wonderful idea.

Here are some questions for us all to consider.

1. What would you tell a young girl about modesty? What does it mean?

2. What do you personally do to remain modest in your appearance?

3. If a woman in your church said your dress was immodest what would you do or say?

Now here is some material for you to consider.
http://www.purefashion.com/ this site has a great modesty guideline allows you have some style.
http://www.achristianhome.org/ a great resource to other sites about modesty
http://www.therebelution.com/ an interesting movement about youth rebelling against the cultural expectations of immodesty.

Monday, May 24, 2010

Ministry Monday! Your Family is your FIRST ministry!

This Ministry Monday is very interesting.  There are a lot of AWESOME events on the horizon. I will share them all with you.  But first I have to talk about my most important ministry.  That is my husband and children.  Some of you may have read my "being his crown" post or even the "wednesday in the word" post last week.  Both of those post at the very heart of them were about my family.  So, I thought I give an update on that.  We are doing well!  My husband is all over it in every way.  For that I am thankful.  My kids are being redirected and I am blessed at what I see in them.  The evidence of grace is all our lives is abundant!  It is my heart that we truly keep a healthy balance between ministry inside and outside the home.  Our lives are a witness of Christ all the time everyday, not just my family but yours too.  It is neccessary that our first disciples (children) not be neglected while making disciples of others.  I think we should all be doing both.  Making disciples of our children and others.  This is just a reminder to me that I must wash my children in the word as we go about each and everyday.  We must seek out teachable moments with our children "by the way, as we go about our day."  The same thing goes for making disciples of others.  As we are in the marketplace (Kroger), the mall, at the library....make disciples.  You don't have to go overseas to make disciples.  You can and should start in your home and then with the neighbor etc. etc.  This is a warning to all (myself included).  Don't neglect your family to reach the neighbor across the seas.  That is actually failure and speaks ill of the gospel.  I am not indicating that your family should be perfect before doing anything outside.  I am however pointing out our need to look deeper into the needs of the disciples that God has automatically given us.  For the husband, you have automatic disciples...wife and children.  For the wife...you have automatic disciples...children and holding the husband accountable.  You are his accountablity partner in all things.  Then from there we make disciples of all men (peoples).  

So, I just wanted to give an update on our purposeful, clear direction within our family as we serve first one another, then the many men and women that God places in our path.  

Okay , so now what is happening with the City of Hope Outreach?

1. Continuing to build relationships in and around this city!
2. June 19, 2010 is the next God, Gospel and Poverty Seminar  this is an awesome way to learn about the needs of the poor in your city and how to be a blessing and not another welfare agency.
3. June 21-25, 2010 we are partnered the United Way to help with there Day of Action.  We will assist with and have created service project around the city of Conway for men and women to volunteer with.  We will have people all over downtown Conway holding signs with stats about poverty in our city.  We are super excited about this.
4. I am heading up a group of ladies to attend the True Woman's Conference in Fort Worth Texas in October.  We still have openings so if you would like to come along with us, contact me.  This is an invitation to all women.
5. Community Lunch This Sunday in Oakwood.  Those are always fun to be apart of.  We will gather for worship as usual at 1:00pm and then break bread during the message for an awesome time of biblical fellowship.  Come and join us if you can.
6. King's Club will be meeting twice per week (tues. and thurs.)  beginning in June until early August.  
7. We have CoHO vehicle stickers for sale.  They are $5 each. They look just like the picture at the top of this blog post.  They are all white and super cool.  

If you are interested in participating in any of these activities and need more detail please leave a comment or email me directly at nfletcher9705@gmail.com 

Thanks

Nicolle

Friday, May 21, 2010

FHM Being His Crown "Blessed to be His Crown"

This FHM “Being His Crown” is all about the blessing of being his crown. We have talked over and over about how important it is that we embrace the true beauty and blessing we are to our husbands. Today I am compelled to share how I am blessed to be the crown worn by my husband. You might call this a bragging session but you shouldn’t! You should call this true rejoicing in the Lord for His provision and wonderful grace displayed in my husband, which should in turn cause you to look at the wonderful blessing your husband is to you. Really consider the fact that your husband could be married to any woman in the world but you are the chosen one! Take a moment to recall that girlfriend of yours who told you about a problem she was experiencing in her marriage. The first thought in your head was, “Oh my…I am thankful not to be married to that man!” The truth is we all have struggles but not every woman is equipped to deal with every struggle. So the struggles you experience in your marriage will be specific to what the Lord is working out in your life. (Okay so I obviously went off on a tangent somewhere. We are back on track now).


Wednesday I experienced one of the worst parenting days of my life. I am aware that it won’t be the last. Anyway, my husband and I rotate morning wake up with the kids. Wednesday was my morning. The kids were in a crazy place and had been for sometime. They seem to have crazy attitudes and all kinds of other issues right now. Needless to say there was a whole lot of chaos that morning. My husband called me into the bedroom and asked me what was wrong. So, I just poured my heart out. I explained to him how the kids are rude to one another, disrespectful and on and on. I went on to say I was diligently searching for what the scripture has to say about respect and authority. I told him that I was worried that they are learning all their ugly behavior from me. I blame myself for their attitudes and whatever else was wrong. He then said, “I will take care of it. We will meet tonight at dinner and address this problem.” He comforted and reassured me that I was not to blame for their behavior. After that I just wept on his chest for about twenty minutes. The kids were still around talking and asking questions, commanding attention etc. My King put an end to all of it! We got the school children off to school and the homeschooled child on to schooling.

Then one of the most amazing things took place. My husband and I made love in such a way that brought healing to my soul. Okay, I do realize I am writing this is on my very public blog, but the Song of Solomon is also very public scripture! Back to the moment, as our bodies intertwined so did our hearts. God used my husband as a protector, provider, prophet, healer, lover and king. My tears were swallowed by his strength. Phil heard and responded to the depths of my pain. Understand that this was not done in his strength. He was able to love and bring healing because of what Christ has done for him. He was in tune with my need by God’s grace.

That evening we sat at the dinner table ate about 3/4th of the meal and then my husband began to speak. He explained that there was going to be a new order in our house. He also took full responsibility for the problem of harsh tone in our house. He explained where it began and how it will end. Christ is our focus and we love because he loved. The hammer was laid down and it was awesome. But he did not leave us with a hammer alone. He then explained how we need to speak to one another in light of the gospel. We need to look for the evidences of grace in the lives of our family members. He spoke as a prophet and protector which brought healing to our whole family. He even purchase a mini, mini container of ice cream for every family member. He explained how Jesus often spoke to the disciples around a meal. Therefore we get to partake of this correction and redirection with joy. That night got to share how we see God working in each of our lives. Before we even think of giving correction we need to see evidence of God’s grace in the life of the other individual. It was clear that he had taken in what I said and then sought Christ for clear direction and just laid it out in the most loving and direct way possible.

I am a very blessed woman! I am privileged to be worn on the head of this man. I love the way he loves me, attends to me, directs me in light of scripture, seeks the Father, looks well to the ways of his household and totally and completely has my back. Translation he would be willing to give of his very life for me. That is the kind of man I have. I am worn on his head in this life forever! Praise the Living God for His gift of love towards me through my husband.

What do you have to share about the man who wears you on his head? You don’t have to share a super long story like I did or you can. I would love to hear how blessed you are to be worn by your man!

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Wednesday's Word!

What does the scripture have to say about respect?  I am on a quest to define and completely nail this topic.  We are called to respect in a million different ways.  Wives see to that you respect your husband.  Children obey your parents.  I think that is a type of respect.  You have to have some level of respect in order to obey another person.  Right?  Well, today I am looking for your help.  Throw out some scriptures and definitions about respect.

Is it disrespectful for a child to express themselves to a parent and point their finger at them?

Is it respectful to be brutally honest with someone?

Is it respectful to call a person older than you by their first name?

What examples in scripture can we look to in order to understand respect better?

Are the lines black and white?  Is there gray area?  Let's take some time to look at this.

I found these scriptures in the concordance of my bible:

Matthew 21:37  (this passage describes a lack of respect),
Romans 13:7 (about giving proper respect to the appropraite people)
I Thessalonians 5:12 (giving respect to those over you, because they labour and love you)
I Peter 2:18 (being respectful even in the really hard areas)

What can you find?  What can we look at together?

Our goal is to understand RESPECT from a biblical perspective.  Respect in relationships such as husband and wife, parent and child, older and younger, and finally peer to peer.