Tuesday, December 23, 2008


There was a small incident in the moblie home park on Sunday. A young girl stole money from my daughters wallet that was inside my van. The amount of money was very little ($6), yet it was the principle that mattered more to me. Then a young boy threw a cookie at my daughter (cookies that my children and I made together for the people of Oakwood). While working for the Lord my daughters were abused and taken advantage of. Hummmmmmmm what do we say about these things?

My first instinct was to unleash the claws! I have had a few times of wanting to unleash my momma wrath, but the Lord held me appropriately. So I prayed and the Lord gave me insight. I drove to the mobile home park to find the mother. She wasn't there so the Lord gave me an opportunity to minister to another lady. Who said "the Lord knew I needed to talk to you". She felt encouraged and was given insight on her situation. Then the mother of the children pulled up. So I told her what took place and how that affected my children.

On Sunday this mother was upset at another child because he was throwing a frisbee and it hit her car. She went wild and profaned the child and told the mother she needed to do something with her child (implying the child was out of control and needed discipline).

I reminded her of that statement and informed her to apply that same expression with her own two children. Titus came to mind....older women teach the younger to love (philio= delight in, friendship, relational love) their husbands and children. So I proceeded to explain that her children need her to delight in them. More than anything this world can offer, they need her and ultimately Christ. They need her to care and be interested in them. So the conversation went really well.

I praise God that He allowed this opportunity so I could further build relationships and address the day to day lives of these women. The Lord allowed me to instruct younger women in righteousness (only found in Christ) and help my children to see how truly blessed they are to have parents who love and care for them. But more importantly their Heavenly Father is abundant in blessings, love, and righteousness. The $6 can be replaced and the cookie was soft! But they saw their mother address sin in a loving, caring way. So I pray that the next time the mama bear claws show, that Christ would again show Himself stronger and greater!

Saturday, December 20, 2008


I am thankful that the Lord allowed us to see this day. As most married couples can testify there were many days and nights we just were not sure we would make it....BUT GOD! I am thankful to God today because He could have chose any man to be my husband. Yet He chose Phillip D. Fletcher from the foundation of the world to be my man...and me his wo man.

We have come a long way. Through the power of the Holy Spirit and God's amazing grace we are able to see a picture in our marriage. That picture is of Christ and His Bride the Church. We have learned to endure for the gospel sake. The endurance has brought both pleasure and pain and I love it!

Happy Anniversary Phil!

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Poetry Series...Poetheology

I truly enjoy poetry. This young lady Blair Wingo is truly gifted by God to expound upon the truth. So take a moment to listen and evaluate your heart in light of the truth.

If you have spoken word skills let us know. We (Berean Christian Ministry) are hosting a Poetheology series beginning in February 2009. Contact me for more information.

Monday, December 15, 2008

Favorite Photos

These pictures were taken in Africa on mission. I love they way they speak to the glory and majesty of Creator God! Enjoy!

Update! Doula or Midwife

I posted a while back about me become a doula or a midwife. Well after some time and prayer I have deceided to begin the training to become a doula which will lead to me becoming a midwife. I am excited because it is just another opportunity for the Lord to use my gifts for His glory. I think it is important that a woman feel as comfortable as possible during one of the most life changing events she will ever experience. So as a doula I will be able to mother the mother in the hospital as well as at a home birth. Many women simply don't understand the fact that God created the human body and in His timing, (not the doctor or nurse who needs to get this one out so they can go to the next one) He will bring life from the womb. Bascially your body will do what God created it to do in its own timing. I digress. I am just excited to be on this new adventure with the Lord. So if you are pregnant or looking to plan a pregnancy and you are in Little Rock, or Conway. Give me a call and I can be your doula :)!

Friday, December 12, 2008

Sinner or Saint (part2)

But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for his own possession, that you may proclaim the excellencies of him who called you out of darkness into his marvelous light. Once you were not a people, but now you are God's people; once you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy.
1 Peter 2:9-10

Well blogger family I'll share what started this whole question of sinner or saint shortly. First I want to thank all who participated in this discussion. It is great when believers can come together and examine our practice in light of scripture. Through the power of the Holy Spirit may we be transformed even more into the image of Jesus Christ.

When God calls a sinner to receive salvation by the blood of Jesus Christ that individual becomes a saint. There is the greatest miracle! A walking, talking DEAD man or woman made ALIVE through the power and work of Jesus Christ on Calvary's Cross. That individual is now a saint and should no longer identify themselves with what was sin. It is like the Jews relying on the law. Christ fulfilled the whole law and for one to go back to it (the law) is to deny the power of the Christ. By identifying oneself with what God has called you out of is to say that Christ isn't enough!

Many struggle with this and so we should take a closer look at it. I'm a practical person and so my examples will be also. I love how Steve mentioned marriage and the changing of the names. Along those lines if I am married am I also single? No I am married. Likewise if I cheat on my spouse am I no longer married to him? Nope, still married. I used that example to say, as saints we will struggle with sin, yet are not bound to or by sin.

There are lots of scripture that tell us not to look back to the former. See Luke 9:62, Phil 3:14, Eph 4:17-24, 1 Peter 1:13-16. Yes we need to remember how sinful we were but the memory should only cause us to worship, honor, and adore Christ all the more. Again it is not by your wonderful works (or should I say bloody menstrual pad) that you are a saint, but by the work of Jesus Christ and Him alone.

The payment for sin is death. Christ paid for your sin from 20 years ago, the sin from today, the sin of tomorrow, and the sin 20 years from today. It is PAID for by the pure, clean, spotless blood of the Lamb Jesus Christ! To continue the claim of sinner is to deny the saving power of Christ.

Oh yeah, how this started. I have been around many saints and I noticed there to be a strong connection with the sins of old and a very weak understanding of our present place in Christ. Tommy hit the nail on the head about defeated saints. We need to see ourselves as God sees us. We tell that to sinners all the time but not so much with saints. You are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation....see above. God loves His children. No matter how you have messed up in times past, present or future, Christ blood is enough. When God looks at you saint, He sees Jesus (whom He was pleased to crush for you!). The righteousness of Christ is placed upon you and your sin was placed upon Him over two thousand years ago. Don't look back saint or you will make His crushing in vain (if it were possible).

Tuesday, December 9, 2008


I have been very busy. So I thought I just post something that would create a little dialog amongst believers. So if you read this post you HAVE TO COMMENT! SMILE...

Is the individual whom the Lord called to receive salvation a sinner or a saint?

Should believers refer to themselves as sinners or saints? Why or why not?

What does God's word say about sinners and saints?

Do you find yourself creating an identity with something God has called you out of?

If so then who is your trust in?

I hope these questions make sense. I am going somewhere with it. Before I go any further I want to hear from believers. So again if you read this post you must respond.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

PRAY for your man!

The Lord opened my eyes to a truth on Tuesday and completed it on Wednesday. I need to be faithfully praying for my husband. Why haven't I been faithful in that area? I just felt like he has it together (with the Lord).

Well after the Lord revealed to me that I pray faithfully for my children and not so much for my husband... I had to do something about it. Then I realized I am not the only woman who seems to neglect to pray for her husband. It seems we expect them (our hubands) to know how to love, care for, and nurture us. When in fact it is as difficult for them as it is for us to submit or be respectful.

So, as the Lord would have it I will be opening my home on Monday nights from 6:30-7:30 for the specific purpose of women coming together to pray for their husbands and marriages. This will not be hang out time but very specific and purposeful prayer. I know many of you would not be able to attend based on location. I would encourage you to open your home to a few ladies to faithfully pray for your husbands as well. If you need more info. holla at me.

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Braving Bullets

The following is the story of Eric Reese who is doing mission work in the urban areas of Rio. His story has been a real source of encouragement as the Lord has called us to do similar work here in Conway. I pray that you are encouraged as well.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Another Song of Song!

I had to post this one. I am personally convicted by what was revealed in this text. I would encourage couples to listen to this message together. If you can't then listen to it and discuss it with your spouse.

Monday, November 10, 2008

Mission To Africa

We went to Tanzania Africa on mission. I just wanted to share the slide I worked so hard to put together. Enjoy!

Thursday, November 6, 2008

Personal Journey

To love someone who won't love you...

This man should have loved me.
This man should have viewed me as the joy of his life.
This man should have taken me for long walks in the park.
This man should have protected me from the man that raped me.
This man should have acknowledged that I belonged to him.
This man should have taught me to look both ways before I cross the street.

Where this man failed....

This woman will succeed.
This woman will love that man, even if he won't love back.
This woman will live a life to display the love of God to that man.
This woman will forgive that man.
This woman will die to herself and honor that man.
This woman will pray for that man.
This woman will speak of the ONE MAN who can save that man.

This is my journey. It is not a secret that I did not have a relationship with my birth father. However the Lord is using me to develop a relationship with the goal of sharing Christ with him. This has been a struggle. Somethings have changed in him but mostly in me. God purposed and planned my live. The one who I have been the most hurt and rejected by is the very one who needs me (well He who dwells in me) more than ever. So I purpose to look beyond my hurt and see the need. The need is for the Savior! My birth father needs Christ and I will succeed in presenting the gospel to him, in love with a pure and sincere heart. I no longer desire for God to get him..but that God would grant him repentance and receive him as the child he was unable to receive me as.


I was in prayer with a dear sister of mine and in her prayer she made a statement that captured my attention. She said...I am parphasing "it is better for no one to lead, than for me to lead above my husband." That was a very loose parphase, but it grabbed hold to my heart. Women in general have a way of making things happen. We will ensure that everything is done and taken care of no matter what! The kids will have what they need, there will be food to eat, we will use apple cider vinegar to clean the counter if we can't afford Pine Sol, we will bark orders to everyone in the house (including our husband). All in the name of service and managing our home well. What she said that day made me think. If there is an area that my husband or your husband has not stepped to the plate do you then assume to step up or are we called to leave that place void, therefore revealing the need for his leadership?

What are your thoughts????

Wednesday, November 5, 2008


Older women.... IT IS TIME TO TEACH! Let me clarify what I mean by older women. Rather let me explain Titus 2 in relation to older women. The older woman here is a married woman who has children. Ladies we need to effort to make time to teach younger women "what is good" Titus 2:3. The "what is good", is to love their husband, love their children, to be self controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husband. Why do we need to teach these things see Titus 2:5b "that the word of God may not be reviled."

Older ladies we have to teach the younger women, because it is through our lives that the unsaved see Christ. When women don't love their own husbands, don't love their children, lack self control, are not pure, don't concern themselves with their home, are unkind, and not submissive to their own husband...they bring reproach on the Gospel of Christ. So I encourage an "older woman" to find a younger women and TEACH what is good!

Younger women...be willing to be taught. Don't assume you know everything. Be humble and receive godly instruction and wisdom in Love. I have pick up this book by Carolyn Mahaney called Feminine Appeal: Seven Virtues of a Godly Wife and Mother. The seven virtures are the "what is good" that the older women are to teach. So it was a perfect line up for me. I am very aware of my role as a wife, however there is alway more to learn that we may bring glory to Christ in all things. As the Lord speaks to my heart I will be sharing with you and I pray that the Lord will speak to your heart as well.

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Me & Midwifery

A friend shared a vision of us becoming a midwifes. I had been very excited about beginning the journey to become a midwife...even if I had to do it alone. Anyway one of the test before I signed the dotted line and committed myself to school for midwifery training, was participating in a live birth. Now the last birth I saw was 1998 my god-daughter, and the last birth I had was 2002. So needless to say, it has been awhile. A dear sister in the Lord was planning a home birth with a midwife and I wanted to be apart of it. Remember this is my test. I had hoped the birth would be on a weekend and it was Saturday! Anyway it was amazing! It was a water birth, which I have never seen before. While observing the labor, it brought back the memories of when I gave birth. I understood and remembered the joy and of course the pain. Then I understood what husbands all over the world must feel when their spouse is in labor....HELPLESS! All you can do is give an encouraging word here and there, but that pain she had to bear all by herself.

Back to the whole midwife journey... I am purposing simply to watch to see if I could stomach the whole thing. Then the midwife put me to work! She was aware that I was interested in becoming a Midwife so immediately she had me doing stuff. Clean this, pick that up, watch this, she was full of wisdom and expertise. I learned so much...I have had three children and had no clue about some of the things I learned that day. For that I am very grateful.

I had been debating between becoming a doula or midwife. What is a doula? I know, I know! I did not understand at first either. Simply put the doula is the mother to the mother.

Doula: A non-medical assistant in childbirth. A doula is not the father but is usually a woman who is experienced in childbirth. The role of the doula is to provide the mother with physical and emotional assistance before, during, or after childbirth. Also known as a birth assistant, birth companion, childbirth assistant, or labor support professional. From the Greek doule referring to a woman who was a slave or servant.

The midwife is the "doctor" to the mother.

Midwife: A person trained to assist a woman during childbirth. Many midwives also provide prenatal care for pregnant women, birth education for women and their partners, and care for mothers and newborn babies after the birth. A midwife may be a man or a woman. Depending on local law, midwives may deliver babies in the mother's home, in a special birthing center or clinic, or in a hospital.

Most midwives specialize in normal, uncomplicated deliveries, referring women with health problems that could require hospitalization during birth to a hospital-based obstetrician. Others work with physicians as part of a team. Legal qualifications required to practice midwifery differ between the US states and various countries.

Okay so you have all the details..you know the difference between a midwife and a doula. So at this point I am praying about the direction the Lord would lead me in. I am very open and simply longing for the Lord's will to be done in and through me.

Birth is an amazing process that all by itself brings GLORY to GOD! Take some time to think about it. The husband gives you a piece of himself then the wifes body nurtures and brings forth the husbands seed! AMAZING! God equipped us with everything we needed to bring forth life...anyway that is why I am interested in the whole process. However I am unsure which end (doula, midwife) to fully embrace. I'll keep you posted on this as I am more aware of the Lord's will for me.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Teaching and Training My Girls

I have begun a character study of women in the scripture with my girls. My daughters are 6 and 7 years old. If you meet them you might suggest their ages to be more like 25 for the 7 year old and 32 for the 6 year old. Anyway, we have studied Eve, Hagar, and Sarah. We read scripture about these women usually on Sunday nights...our gender segregated discipleship time. Two weeks ago we reviewed these ladies. The purpose was and is to see these women of faith and learn from them. I believe I learned as much if not more than the girls during our review.

"What do we remember about Eve?" I asked. "I can tell you about Adam!" Najee' exclaims. "He did not protect his wife from the serpent. He just sat there and watched his wife in sin and did nothing." From this comment it is clear that this is my child."Okay, good Najee'. But what can you as girls who will become women learn from Eve?" I said. "We need to do what God says." she replied. With that we all agreed. "What else can we learn Nichelle?" Her response was, "We can walk away from the devil, when he tells us to sin."

Okay now what about Sarah? I said. Their thoughts were as follows...."She laughed at the Lord when he told her she was going to have child. Then it got a little stirred in the room because the girls remembered Hagar. Nichelle had been stuck on this for some time now..."Why would she give her husband to that woman? Yeah and then she went all crazy and got mad at him for doing what she said. Then she kicked her out and was mean to her. What was all that about?" Najee stated, "Because she didn't believe God was going to do what He said because it is hard for old people to have babies. It would really hurt! Especially if you are old. She just needed to believe the Lord and listen to what He said, not what she felt or what things looked like." All of that came from their mouths... which again is amazing but to be expected if you know my girls...well my son too.

Anyway from that I took away that we need to believe God at His word. At times it seems a little more difficult today because we don't frequently hear or see angels or the Lord Himself come to give us a specific message. However He does give His word that has an answer for everything. We simply need to look. So this is a simple reminder of our need to trust and depend on the Lord in everything.

Friday, October 24, 2008

Song Of Songs

I have been listening to Mark Driscoll of Mars Hill Church preach through the Song of Songs. This message addressed some very familiar concerns within our Christian community. So I posted the full sermon that you may hear and view this message. Feel free to comment and create a dialogue about what was spoken.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008


This past Sunday, my husband preached a sermon about Adam. He very specifically stated that the intent of this message was for the male. It's not very often that men are truly called to the carpet. Well, I must say the Lord used him to really bring light to the subject of men in our Christian culture. He dealt with the first Adam and finished with the second Adam our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. He pulled no punches in regard to Adam's lack of leadership in his home (the Garden of Eden). God gave man the responsibility to work the ground, manage his home and not eat of the tree of knowledge of good and evil. God saw fit to create a helper for Adam, in Eve. All wonderful things, yet Adam was unwilling to love his wife by teaching and instructing her. He basically left her to manage and handle the serpent while he watched. How many men today are simply watching their wives be responsible to work the ground, manage the home, and fight the serpent? I'd have to say far too many.
Praise God that what was lacking in the first Adam was brought to completion in the second Adam. Phil (husband) made this awesome comparison one I hadn't heard before. God gave the first Adam a wife, by putting him to sleep and pulling her from his side! God gave the second Adam a bride, by putting Him to death (sleep). I just thought that was the coolest thing. God gave Christ a bride (the church) like Adam. However the Lord will not leave his bride to content with life or the serpent alone. In fact He deals with the serpent and encourages His bride the trust in Him, walk with Him, believe in Him.. and He will deliver. Now that was just a micro version of what was shared on Sunday.
Often there is an imbalance between men and women. More often then not men want to rule and dominate without being servants themselves. I hear a lot of man say "don't the Bible say the woman needs to obey the husband". Yes it does sir, but did you also read that the husband is to sacrifice even to his very life for the wife? Or that the husband is to love the wife as his own flesh? What man hates his own flesh or is unwilling to give the best to himself? Maybe not, that doesn't sound so cool! Christ demonstrated this perfectly. As a result man has no excuse! He laid out the example. So I would encourage the men of Faith to serve their families in loving leadership. Please do not call yourself a man of God and leave your wife and children to deal with the concerns and cares of the this life alone. Or worse, the man like the first Adam who does not lead, but follows into sin and then points a finger at the woman when called to account. Now that is a shame!
So I post this blog to say WHERE ARE YOU ADAM? Men have the responsibility to lead as a servant. I want to encourage men born like the first Adam to be born again and look like the Second ADAM!

Sunday, October 5, 2008


My daughter Najee’ often waits for her daddy to come home from work at the end of the driveway. She will often call him wanting to know exactly where he is on his route home. Today I watched God use my 7 year old to speak loud and clear to me. It was about 6:00P.M. Phil’s ETA was between 5 and 20 minutes. It was raining pretty hard at this point. Najee’ gets the umbrella and stands in the rain at the end of the driveway waiting for her dad. She remained there until he arrived about 10 minutes later. She was confident that her daddy was coming and he would meet her…so she was willing to wait.
Then it hit me. Many of us believe in Christ but are unwilling to wait on Him. She stood in the rain longing for her dad and confident he would come.

Are we that faithful? Will we stand in the rain (through hard trials and tribulation)? Can we endure hardships and still stand confident that our Heavenly Father will meet us? I am challenged by this. Are you? I am challenged to stand in the rain and wait on my Glorious Savior to meet me!

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Praising Christ with my Daughter

My youngest daughter Nichelle and I were given an opportunity to share Christ in dance at Peace Lutheran Church in Conway, Arkansas. It was truly a blessing! That Sunday morning was the conclusion of their vacation bible school (VBS) sharing that Jesus gives us the power to be brave, thankful, helpful, share the good news and live eternally. All three of my children participated in this VBS and loved it. Nichelle, however was able to live out what she learned through this dance. I taught her this dance in two days..she is six years old. She shared with me that she was afraid to do it. We talked about how this week she learned that Jesus gives us the power to be brave..remember Peter who walked on water? Keep your eyes on Jesus and He will give you the power to be brave. So view this dance and worship Christ with us, for He does give us the power to be brave and not only that…it is He who gives us the ability to COME TO JESUS! Thank you Daddy for allowing us an opportunity to come to you through Jesus Christ.

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Does A Fish Know It Is Wet #2

As stated before I have been on a journey of discovery. I am discovering my responsibility as a believer in the fellowship with other saints. It has been one of great trial and exhausting examination. I have not only had the opportunity to see scripture in a new light, I have been able to walk it out. So the last post, “Does a fish know it’s wet?” has become very real to me. I have been able to examine some traditional practices against the word of God. I found I was wet in many respects.
Here is where we are as a Christian culture. Women and men are trying to become so equal that God given distinctions are lost. Women teach men in bible study, often to the neglect of teaching younger women and their own children. Men have taken a back seat and allowed women to be in control of everything. In most of the local church settings, women are the dominant force. The men can’t be found. When it comes to teaching, a man would be more willing to ask a woman to teach so he wouldn’t have to fulfill his role in the gathering or even the home. Basically our homes are out of order, thus when we gather as believers our fellowship will be led wrong and our thinking will be wrong as well. By wrong I mean unbiblical. Please remember I am talking to believers in THE ONE TRUE LIVING GOD.
This is what God’s word tells us we need to ascribe to. I will hit pretty hard on the women issue only because I am a woman. I believe that where scripture calls you out, you must respond accordingly. So I will lay out some text and go from there.
“As in all the churches of the saints, the women should keep silent in the churches. For they are not permitted to speak, but should be in submission, as the Law also says. If there is anything they desire to learn, let them ask their husbands at home. For it is shameful for a woman to speak in the church.” 1 Corinthians 14:33b-35
Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled. Titus 2:3-5
Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct. Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening. 1 Peter 3:1-6
Let a woman learn quietly with all submissiveness. I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man; rather, she is to remain quiet. 1 Timothy 2:11-12
And when they had entered, they went up to the upper room, where they were staying, Peter and John and James and Andrew, Philip and Thomas, Bartholomew and Matthew, James the son of Alphaeus and Simon the Zealot and Judas the son of James. All these with one accord were devoting themselves to prayer, together with the women and Mary the mother of Jesus, and his brothers. Acts 1:13-14
On the next day we departed and came to Caesarea, and we entered the house of Philip the evangelist, who was one of the seven, and stayed with him. He had four unmarried daughters, who prophesied. Acts 21:8-9
but every wife who prays or prophesies with her head uncovered dishonors her head, since it is the same as if her head were shaven…… Nevertheless, in the Lord woman is not independent of man nor man of woman; for as woman was made from man, so man is now born of woman. And all things are from God. Judge for yourselves: is it proper for a wife to pray to God with her head uncovered? Does not nature itself teach you that if a man wears long hair it is a disgrace for him, but if a woman has long hair, it is her glory? For her hair is given to her for a covering. 1 Corinthians 11:5;12-15
Simply stated, women according to scripture are to pray, prophesy, learn in submission to their own husband, not teach men or have authority over men, teach younger women what is good, adorn themselves in holiness, be respectful and pure, and be silent in the gathering of the saints during the teaching. All of this may seem to be a hard pill to swallow. It was for me in the beginning. The first time I was told to submit to my husband about ten years ago I literally flipped. I was not at all receptive to that information even though it was and is the word of God. So, today the Lord in His grace and mercy is calling me to be dried out even the more in order that I may die to the flesh and live in Him.
A woman’s silence in the gathering is one of the controversial issues in the body of believers. For most people who attend a traditional church gathering where the preacher or pastor is the sole or primary bible teacher it is not very difficult to be silent. In fact everyone is silent.
My family gathers on Saturdays in homes with other believers to build one another up in the faith, through prayer, fellowship and the Lord’s Supper. The purpose for this gathering is that we may all be equipped for every good work in Christ. The structure for our meeting is laid out in 1 Corinthians 14:26-40, often termed “participatory meeting.” In that meeting the women are silent during the teaching. The silence from the women propels the men to lead in the teaching. When a meeting is dominated by one individual it creates a dependency on that one person rather than each believer studying to scriptures themselves and presenting truth to build up. During the week we are to be lifting one another in prayer and seeking the Lord for what He would have one to share to build up the body of believers. Remember the scriptures tell us to build one another up, to teach the young women and children, pray and prophesy that all may be built up.
So how does a woman’s silence build up others? If the women are silent it pushes the men to their place. They are called to lead, instruct in the word of God, to love and serve. Often women overshadow their husbands and no where in scripture do we see that God honors that. I am silent that my husband and the other men may lead. I receive as much if not more because I am able to hear, without preparing my next statement. What the Lord has awakened me to is the following…I show respect to my husband by participating in silence during the instruction of the word. Most importantly, I am following a command of the Lord.
In times past I have taught the adult Sunday school class. In most of our local fellowships the Sunday school classes are mixed with male and female. Well the word of God would say that practice is unbiblical. Can a woman teach? Yes! The question is not if she can teach, but to whom does God say she can teach. We are to teach our children first and foremost, then we teach other women. We are also examples to our husband and other men. In my silence my husband stated, “You have taught me the importance of listening to God.” It was not that he did not listen to God however he was able to see honor, respect, and obedience in a new light because of my obedience. So is the scripture telling women that we are second class citizens and you have nothing of value to say? God forbid! The scripture is telling us to line up! Jesus Christ who is himself God, submitted to God the Father in all things. Over and over we see especially in the gospel of John, that Jesus came to do the will of the Father. If we truly desire to love and obey God we will be willing, in fact desirous to obey and seek His will above our own. I did not write the scripture. We must stop fighting the truth and scripture and effort to live it out through the power of the Holy Spirit. The things we don’t fully understand, the Holy Spirit will teach us in due time.
Today I would classify myself as a drying fish. I can’t fully say I have dried up but the Lord is gracious and pouring Himself more and more. What an exciting thought! The comment room is always open. Let me know how dry you are.

Friday, September 5, 2008

Does A Fish Know It Is Wet #1

This is an interesting question. When I first heard it, I did not understand it. I am sure some of you feel the same way. Allow me to shed some light, now that I have been enlightened. A fish lives in water, enjoys the water and finds its source of life in the water. So of course the fish does not know that it is wet until it is pulled out of the water. Only then can the fish become aware that it was wet. It becomes clear to the fish that without being wet, they will die. The fish will “freak out” wanting to be wet again. If released back into the water, the fish will become wet and thus live happily according to plan. However, if left out of the water, the fish will die and have no need for water or ever be wet.
Nicolle what is that all about? I am glad you asked. Let’s look at it this way. Humans are “fish.” There are only two kinds of humans, regenerate and unregenerate. The unregenerate human is the one who does not place their hope and trust in the one true living God. They are lost and apart from the saving grace of Jesus, remaining lost and separated from the one true living God. Every human begins his or her life this way. We are born in sin and shaped in iniquity. Then there are those the Father has mercy upon and calls them unto Himself through the precious blood of Jesus Christ. These humans would be regenerate, believers, Christians, children of God, the bride of Christ, the church. The regenerate person is called to live their life according to the will of the Father in heaven. That will is laid out in the Holy Scriptures which was given to us for our learning, and that we may believe Jesus is the Christ the Son of God.
The water in this illustration is our current American culture. The American culture overall boils down to a few points. The first is self love. Self help, self improvement, self indulgence, self worship are just a few of the things we do in our society to make gods of ourselves. Second, the cultures view of marriage. Our culture says marriage is basically a death sentence with the option of bail through divorce. One may be set free to indulge in the simple pleasures of one lustful contact to the next. Again, it is all about the love and worship of oneself. Another cultural view, homosexuality is just a free expression of love between two same sex individuals. God forbid we say anything negative about this lifestyle, because culturally you would be committing a HATE CRIME! I’ll finish with two other thoughts as I could go on for weeks. Children! The culture says children are an unfortunate result of sexual contact. “If I get pregnant I will just kill the thing. It’s my body my choice.” I have to agree there is choice but it is not to keep or not keep the life…it is to open or not open your legs! Forgive me I digress. The final thought of the culture is relationship between men and women. The culture says, “Woman you run things!” Be in control of things at home, on the job, and dominate your man and any man for that matter. After all they are stupid and can’t accomplish anything without you!”
Now dear Christian, I present to you biblical truth to nullify the views of the culture. Self Love, Marriage, Sexuality, Life, Children, Men, & Women…what does the scripture say? True love is sacrificial and obedient. Abraham was willing to sacrifice his only son in obedience to the will of God. God himself sacrificed His only Son for the love of His children. Christ was obedient to the Father even to the point of death on the cross. Repeatedly Jesus tells us He has come to do the will of the Father…not His own. This is love! If you are not obedient to the Lord (him who sent you) and don’t live a life of sacrifice, you have no love. Marriage is ordained by God in creation with Adam and Eve. A marriage is one man and woman united in one flesh. They are a picture of Christ and the Church. Christ and His church will endure hardship and joys… yet they will endure eternally. So in our marriages we are to endure until God calls one or both to Himself. Sexually, we are to flee lustful, immoral passions and desires. In your marriage (one man & one woman) you are free to express your God given sexuality as you both enjoy. From that enjoyment we are to be fruitful. Make babies for they are a heritage of the Lord. We have no authority to take life that is given to us by God. We are but created beings for the good pleasure of God! I have spoken before about women and men. How the scripture states women are made for the man and not man for the woman. The word also states that man is the head and should love his wife, and be willing to die for her as Christ did for his bride. The woman should respect her husband, be willing to submit to his authority and the bride of Christ does.
Okay I have laid a foundation for what I really want to talk about. The original question was, “Does a fish know it is wet?” I have to admit being unknowingly wet in some areas. As believers we are called to be transformed by the renewing of our minds in Christ Jesus. That said, I propose we are to no longer be wet fish submerged into this cultural way of thinking but we are to be dry fish. We are to look at this life through the lens of scripture. We the culture says one thing and God says another. We need to obey God period. When we are dry fish we die to the pleasures of this life and in fact are made alive in Christ. So in order to live we must die! This is not a new concept or saying, it is biblical, its truth and we should die so we can live!
So, brothers and sisters take time to examine your life and thoughts. Have you been called to be a dry fish and unknowingly soaking wet? I will conclude with this scripture that opened my eyes to how wet I was…. As in all the churches of the saints, the women should keep silent in the churches. For they are not permitted to speak, but should be in submission, as the Law also says. If there is anything they desire to learn, let them ask their husbands at home. For it is shameful for a woman to speak in the church. Please share your comments! I want to hear from you. We will visit this again, very soon.

Monday, September 1, 2008


The question I have struggled with for years. Brief update…I have a sperm donor for a father who only acknowledges my existence when it is to his advantage. In my almost 32 years of life I have had 6 encounters with my father/sperm donor. Yes I have counted! That in itself is a problem. Here is the bigger picture; he the sperm donor had an affair 32 years ago. To my knowledge his wife of over forty years is unaware of this fact. This story …my story is sad, sad, sad. Why is this story so sad? Because this man, this father, this sperm donor has chosen his own comfort. His comfort would include a wife and children by this wife….a family that does not include a lust child. I, the lust child, his undeniable flesh and blood have endured public denials not once but twice. Not to mention this is a continued denial from this “family” that brings him the most comfort.
Here is my question again…who am I? If only his through sperm, then to whom do I really belong? Where can I look for find my heritage, or a sense of belonging? Who accepts me for who I am, then encourages me to do and be better? Who will be a loving guide for me when I struggle and don’t understand this life? How can I explain a father’s love to my own children if I have no model for this type of love? What do I look for in my husband as he fathers our children? These are the questions that have haunted me for years, and many of you may have the same questions.
Through all of this I have learned that I have a Father who is truly awesome! That Father is my Heavenly Father! My Daddy is the ONE who created the entire universe and sustains it by His very WORD! He knew me before time began. My conception and birth were not a surprise to Him but in fact was purposed by Him. I am His! I am created in His image and His likeness. He has written a 66 book love letter for me. Contained within those pages are instructions on how to live, and love according to my Father. Again we are talking about the Creator God my Daddy who formed everything.
Talk about heritage, and family history…I have no lack! I have a family history that can be traced to before there was life on earth, in fact before there was earth. My Heavenly Father has poured out His love for me through the life of His Son Jesus Christ. He has given me direction, inspiration and a reason to live. It is this love that I pattern my life after. I look like my Daddy, through Christ I act like my Daddy. He doesn’t leave me. He walks with me. My Daddy has demonstrated His love for me by His Son Jesus Christ. Because my Dad is Perfect, Holy, Righteous, and Just, He doesn’t accept individuals who are not perfect, not holy, not Righteous, and Not Just. I by my nature fall in the not category. Yet, my Dad was very aware of my inability to attain His standards by myself. He sent His son to fulfill the requirement for me. So my Dad looks at me and sees the work of Jesus Christ and receives me. I did nothing to attain His favor, nothing to attain His Love, or be His child. But He did it all. Christ paid the price for me to be known of God. That was God’s plan for me before time began. So I embrace my past, my present, and my future with the understanding that I belong to God!
So Who AM I? I am Nicolle Sherrie Fletcher child of the Most High God, beloved of the Father, Known of the Son, Comforted by the Holy Spirit, grafted into the body of believers by the Perfect Sinless Blood of Jesus Christ. God has lavished His love upon me. He will never deny me because I am sustained in Christ as His child for eternity. I belong to GOD!

To All The Titus 2 Teachers Who Didn't Know They Were Teaching

This is all about the women who God has placed in my life to teach me. These women are unaware of their impact on my life. However today I feel lead to give them a shout out and encourage them to continue in the Faith and stand firm in the truth. Not one of these women sat me down to tell me any of these things. They were simply living their lives to honor the Lord as they knew and know how. From them I have grown and are continuing to grow into a mature woman in Christ. So this is my Ode or Shout Out to You!

Angie Cate: Taught me that children are gifts from God. They are to be a delight to their parents.

Abby Swaney: Taught me submission!

Brenda Lindsay: Taught me what it means to be hospitable, love others, and remain focused on loving your husband and training your children.

Carla Owen: Showed me what a quiet and mild spirit looks like.

Cheri Steininger: Taught me to endure hardship as a good soldier. My reward is in Heaven. If I am faithful to Christ He will be faithful to me. Suffering in this life only brings us closer to Christ. We are no greater than He who suffered all for us.

Donna Yeager: Taught me how to be relational with a teenage daughter. I don’t have to practice that one yet…However I do have an example.

Holly Massie: Taught me that I can teach and educate my children. Not to fear what I don’t know or don’t understand but to walk in what the Lord has instructed.

Karen Robins: Taught me to pray faithfully and wait on the Lord.

Kawana Hayes: Taught me to be bold and stand up for what is right. To speak the truth in love, with Boldness!

Kay Wenzel: Taught me to Honor My Husband and to be His delight. Kay taught me the importance of Prayer for my children, MIT. To train them in the way of the Lord so when they are to make their own decisions we can trust them to do well and not lord over them.

Kristin Hathaway: Taught me to put family first. To worship the Lord with my Family and live out my faith with them. First family I observed practicing family integrated worship!

Stephanie Johnson: Taught me to evangelize. My faith is not real if I hide it and in fact don’t seek out the Lost to share the good news of the gospel.

Tambi Gregor: Taught me what it means to serve others. She taught me to be diligent in my search of the Lord in scripture.

Tawanna Purter: Taught me to give of myself sexually to my husband without shame.

So once again Ladies I thank you for how the Lord has used you to show me His truth!

Friday, August 15, 2008

A Call for Moms to PRAY!

I am sure by this point in your life you have heard of the book Power of a Praying Wife, by Stormie O’Martin. She has gone on to write Power of a Praying Mother, Parent, Woman, Man, Husband and almost every aspect you can think of. The principle is the same. We must take time to pray for the ones we love and care for the most. Scripture even tells us to pray for our enemies…Stormie O’Martin hasn’t written that book yet.
This school year 2008-2009 I am excited to lead a prayer group for my children’s school Marguerite Vann Elementary in Conway Arkansas. The prayer group is called Moms in Touch International. This is an international organization of women (moms in particular) who meet on a weekly basis for one hour to pray about their children and schools. The vision of Moms in Touch is that every school in the world would be covered with prayer. What an awesome vision.
Moms in Touch International (MITi) teaches moms how to pray scripture over their children and the school. When the group prays they concentrate on one subject at a time. MITi uses four steps of prayer Praise, Confession, Thanksgiving, & Intercession. We use scripture to guide us through prayer and praise concerning a specific attribute of God. I greatly enjoy this process, because in praise we are able to see what God’s word says about Himself. It builds our confidence in Him as one who we can take our burdens and cares to because He can handle them. Confession is important! Confessed sin literally crushes the power of sin in the life of the believer. So, we give thanks to God who has forgiven our sins. We take this time to thank Him for prayers answered. Remember, answered prayers help us to understand that the Lord does hear our cries. Now that we have identified who God is, confessed our sin and drawn closer to the Lord with thanksgiving, we are able to make intercession for the lives of our children and their teachers/staff.
What should I pray for my children?
v Pray for their relationship with Christ
That they Know, Honor, Love, & Worship Christ
v Pray for godly attributes
Respect authority, love others, hate sin, are self controlled, exhibit fruit of the Spirit
v Pray for relationships with family
Honor their Mother and Father, are kind towards siblings, accept discipline and are obedient
v Pray for relationships with friends
That they would choose godly friends, be a witness to the lost within their peer group, stand firm in their faith convictions and withstand peer pressure, and befriend the lonely
v Pray for protection
From Satan, sin, drugs, victimization, in purity, physical danger
v Pray for the future
The kind of person they will be as adults, for wisdom, career paths, and that they would use their abilities for Glorify Christ in every way!

Mom, if not you then who will pray for the hearts and lives of your children? If you are interested in finding a local MITi group near you visit http://www.momsintouch.org/. Let’s commit the lives of our children to their Creator. Your children are gifts on loan to you by God, be a good steward of their heart, mind, body, and soul. Give them to the LORD in prayer!

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Submission: A Woman's High Calling!

On July 2 -July 5, 2008 my family and I had the privilege to participate in the first Family Driven Faith family camp hosted by Dr. Voddie Baucham Jr. in Sandia, Texas (Zephyr Baptist Encampment). We gathered as families to worship Christ, fellowship, break bread, encourage, and enjoy each other through a host of activities. These four days were packed full of God’s word in didactic and visual instruction. In this blog I will share a portion of what I learned at this camp as a woman through the Scriptures.
This information will be life changing. What will you do? How do you view yourself as a Christian woman in light of our current culture? I found that more often then not Christian women can’t identify what God says because they believe what the culture says. We tend to believe what we see and not what God says. Why is that? First we don’t read Scripture in its proper context. We superimpose our modern worldview on Scripture, instead of being transformed by the renewing of the mind in Christ to understand the script. So women this is for you!

Then the LORD God said, “It is not good that man be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.”…But for Adam there was not a helper fit for him….And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. Genesis 2:18; 20b; 22 ESV

For man was not from woman, but woman from man. Neither was man created for woman, but woman for man. 1 Corinthians 11:8-9 ESV

Women were created for the man! Through these two passages of Scripture in the Old and the New Testament, we clearly see that the very creation of the woman was for the man. Woman was a gift to man from the very beginning. The woman is the glory of the husband. (1 Corinthians 11:7) God saw that man needed a helper and provided the woman. This in no way changes the fact that women were made to worship the true and living God. Remember, the woman is a helper to the man created by God! Our worship as women belongs to God and God alone. Our service as women belongs to our husband. If you are not married then your service is to your parents until you are wed.

Women are to BE, submissive, self controlled, humble and quiet. This list speaks of the character of the woman. A woman can only be submissive and quiet if she has self control. The term submission in Scripture is actually a military term that means “rank.” So as a woman, we are to rank ourselves under our husbands. That means whether we think he is right or wrong, we submit to his authority that has been given by the living God. I pulled these character traits because they hit me the hardest. However I will only tackle them one entry at a time.

Submission to our husband is a command given to women by God. Everything has its place. If my knee thought it better to function as the bicep, how would by body maintain motion? My whole body would suffer as a result of that knee functioning a way other than its intended purpose. So I have learned it is best to stay in my place and function how God created me as a woman, wife and mother.

As we dig a litter deeper underneath the surface, we not only need to submit in deed but in our hearts and minds. Many women will submit to their husbands without proper respect in their hearts. Following his instruction while saying to a girlfriend or just in your mind that he is dumb and this is stupid…. IS SIN! I know those are strong words but it is very much the truth. Submission is an action, but more than that it is an attitude of the heart. The Lord says he will give His children a new heart. If you have found yourself in sin concerning this area ask the Lord to give you a new heart, and transform your mind. Please note that this is a daily walk. You will not just be changed and never sin again. The Scripture in 1 John 2:1 teaches us that when we do sin we have an advocate with the Father, who is Jesus Christ. Dear sister run to the Savior daily that you might find joy in who and how He has created you. The humble, quiet, submissive, and self controlled woman who is the crowning glory of her husband.