My daughter's Golden Birthday is TODAY!

Nichelle my youngest daughter is 9 today.  This a super special birthday in our house because she is 9 on the 9th of January.  So we call that your golden birthday.  It only happens once in a lifetime so there you go.  We celebrated her birthday with a slumber party camping theme.  We invited nine girls over our house.  We had a bonfire in our front yard for the first hour.  They played games out front with my husband and we all roasted marshmallows and made smores that was super fun.  Then we journeyed indoors to have a dance party.  The video is up on YouTube and facebook (I whip my hair) so much fun. Of course cake, ice cream, presents a few more games and then (mommas mind) wind down movie.  They watched a movie and then wanted to dance party again! Oh, my word!  So we had a dance party with the Wii games.  That was fun.  Then about 1am I thought people you must go to sleep.  So I gave them THE SPEECH!  That goes a little something like this, "You girls need to go to sleep right now, if you don't I will call Mr. Fletcher out here and he is going to yell at you all!"  The truth was my husband was already sleep, but I promise that works every single time.  I don't know why, Phil has never yelled at anyone who has slept over but they obey.  They went to sleep at about 2am officially.  They woke up the next morning and had muffins, fruit and OJ.  They made beads in the morning and hung out until their parents arrived.  It was a great day for her!

Today we will celebrate even more by giving her our family gifts at 9am!  Then a special dinner of her choosing this evening.  We will finish the day by retelling the story of her birth! 

Here are some lovely pictures of my 9 year old!

Happy Birthday Nichelle!

Memorial Day!

Memorial Day is a United States federal holiday observed on the last Monday of May. Formerly known as Decoration Day, it commemorates U.S. men and women who died while in the military service. First enacted to honor Union soldiers of the American Civil War (it is celebrated near the day of reunification after the Civil War), it was expanded after World War I.

Here is a video and song for you to be still and reflect on your freedom today!  You have heard it time and time again FREEDOM IS NOT FREE!  Salvation is not free!  Christ PAID for your salvation! 

Please remember MEN AND WOMEN ARE PAYING FOR YOUR FREEDOM EVERYDAY!

I want to say thank you to the men and women that serve this country!

I want to say thank you for the wives and husbands who scarifice every day for our freedom. 

Thank you for enduring long nights away from home.  The repeat tours overseas.  The years you miss of the lives of those you love the most.  The moms thank you for being strong!  Thank you for building community around women and men that are waiting at home.  Thank you for praying.  Thank you for being strong when your spouse is not the same upon their return home.  Thank you for loving them.  Thank you for writing letters and sending care packages.  Thank you for your leadership! 

THANK YOU FOR BEING WILLING TO GIVE YOUR LIFE FOR SOMETHING GREATER THAN YOURSELF! 

THANK YOU MILITARY FAMILY FOR ALWAYS SUPPORTING EVEN IN THE MOST DIFFICULT SITUATIONS.

PRAISE THE LORD FOR MEN AND WOMEN WHO LOST THEIR LIFE IN BATTLE.  IT IS BECAUSE OF THEIR SCARIFICE THAT WE CAN BE FREE TODAY!

TO OUR SOLDIERS AND THEIR FAMILY I SAY THANK YOU FOREVER AND ALWAYS!

 

Please comment on this post and thank or remember a soldier by writing their name and if you would like add a special note about them.


To my husband (former) Captain Phillip Fletcher.....Thank you for every hard scarifice!  Thank you for the love you have for your family and those who serve alongside you.  Thank you for being strong enough to stand for something greater than yourself.  Thank you for being disciplined! I love you for being the man you are.  I thank God for what you and I both learned and experienced as a military family.  ARMY STRONG HOOAH!
 

Funny Family Moments in the Fletcher House!

So Phil and I wanted to know what our children think about dating.  This conversation began by our children asking the question, "At what age will we be able to go to the movies with just our friends?"  Our answer was pretty simple.  We will not create a standard age for our children to do anything really.  It will depend on their independent level of responsibility, friends, obedience, the movie they want to see etc.  Basically it will be to our discretion and on a child by child basis!  That conversation lead into another.  The topic of dating.  Phil and I don't think we have come to a complete conclusion on the topic.  We have heard so much and simply are not sure which way to go with it.  We have talked about courting, arranged marriage, dating, banning all forms of contact between the opposite gender outside of parental relationship and on and on.  Phil has talked about polishing weapons and intimidating all males and I have threatened to ban all "chicken heads" from our house.  But what is a realistic expectation?  This is still a matter of prayer and praise the Lord that we still have time to wait and hear from the Lord.

In the meantime, Phil and I both know each one of our children have formed their own opinions about dating, courting and the rest.  So here are the results.

Our 11 year old boy says.....
Well the problem with dating is if people have sex, make out, or kiss.  So if you don't have sex, or make out or kiss people should be able to date at 10 years old.  Our question to him was, "Son, what would a person do with a boyfriend or girlfriend at the age of 10 years old?"  his response was they could hold hands outside of school. 

Then we have our youngest an 8 year old girl says.....
I think we should date at the age of 18!  She was very excited about her answer.  We are not sure if that is her true belief or if she just wanted to answer the question according to what we think would be a good answer.  She went on to explain that 18 was a good age because you should be going to college and have the high school stuff out of the way and your maturity is in place to date.

Finally our middle child a 9 year old girl says....
You have to date at the age of 16 years old.  Because you need at least 3-4 years to get to know a person before you marry them.  I will be married at 20.  She went on to say that she and her friend watched a show called, "Say yes to the dress" and she was 49 getting married for the first time.  Oh, my she was way too old to be getting married for the first time.  Who wants to be that old and getting married.  I mean you can't even have children then.  You body is starting to breakdown.  No, way man.  I want a boyfriend at 16 for my birthday gift! 

Okay people what do we say to these things!  I will admit a whole lot of laughter took place after that conversation.  However I thought it was good to hear what they think about these topic without spoon feeding them our thoughts and beliefs.  We certainly took the time to shape some of what was said, but even more so I had to examine my thoughts on a few things.

What is the appropriate age to allow your children to develop relationships with the opposite gender.  In some ways I feel like the rules are the same as the movie rules.  Phil had to look long and hard about Najee's thoughts and her 16th birthday request.  LOL But seriously!  Naj is my home schooled child, who has really learned this year about being a wife and mother.  So naturally her desire would be towards marriage and motherhood.  We are also currently in a sea of young people getting married at the age of 18-24 years old.  Even I got married at 21 years old.  I can see where that thought process came from.

I don't know.  What do you think?  What are you teaching your children about dating, courting and the opposite gender?  What is your philosophy about this topic with your kids?  Do you look at your dating experience and think it is something they should follow or is your experience something you want your children to avoid?  Let's chat about that.  I want to hear from you.

 

Ministry Monday! Your Family is your FIRST ministry!

This Ministry Monday is very interesting.  There are a lot of AWESOME events on the horizon. I will share them all with you.  But first I have to talk about my most important ministry.  That is my husband and children.  Some of you may have read my "being his crown" post or even the "wednesday in the word" post last week.  Both of those post at the very heart of them were about my family.  So, I thought I give an update on that.  We are doing well!  My husband is all over it in every way.  For that I am thankful.  My kids are being redirected and I am blessed at what I see in them.  The evidence of grace is all our lives is abundant!  It is my heart that we truly keep a healthy balance between ministry inside and outside the home.  Our lives are a witness of Christ all the time everyday, not just my family but yours too.  It is neccessary that our first disciples (children) not be neglected while making disciples of others.  I think we should all be doing both.  Making disciples of our children and others.  This is just a reminder to me that I must wash my children in the word as we go about each and everyday.  We must seek out teachable moments with our children "by the way, as we go about our day."  The same thing goes for making disciples of others.  As we are in the marketplace (Kroger), the mall, at the library....make disciples.  You don't have to go overseas to make disciples.  You can and should start in your home and then with the neighbor etc. etc.  This is a warning to all (myself included).  Don't neglect your family to reach the neighbor across the seas.  That is actually failure and speaks ill of the gospel.  I am not indicating that your family should be perfect before doing anything outside.  I am however pointing out our need to look deeper into the needs of the disciples that God has automatically given us.  For the husband, you have automatic disciples...wife and children.  For the wife...you have automatic disciples...children and holding the husband accountable.  You are his accountablity partner in all things.  Then from there we make disciples of all men (peoples).  

So, I just wanted to give an update on our purposeful, clear direction within our family as we serve first one another, then the many men and women that God places in our path.  

Okay , so now what is happening with the City of Hope Outreach?

1. Continuing to build relationships in and around this city!

2. June 19, 2010 is the next God, Gospel and Poverty Seminar  this is an awesome way to learn about the needs of the poor in your city and how to be a blessing and not another welfare agency.

3. June 21-25, 2010 we are partnered the United Way to help with there Day of Action.  We will assist with and have created service project around the city of Conway for men and women to volunteer with.  We will have people all over downtown Conway holding signs with stats about poverty in our city.  We are super excited about this.

4. I am heading up a group of ladies to attend the True Woman's Conference in Fort Worth Texas in October.  We still have openings so if you would like to come along with us, contact me.  This is an invitation to all women.

5. Community Lunch This Sunday in Oakwood.  Those are always fun to be apart of.  We will gather for worship as usual at 1:00pm and then break bread during the message for an awesome time of biblical fellowship.  Come and join us if you can.

6. King's Club will be meeting twice per week (tues. and thurs.)  beginning in June until early August.  

7. We have CoHO vehicle stickers for sale.  They are $5 each. They look just like the picture at the top of this blog post.  They are all white and super cool.  

If you are interested in participating in any of these activities and need more detail please leave a comment or email me directly at nfletcher9705@gmail.com 

Thanks

Nicolle

FAMILY CAMP 2009

Finally, I have something to say and time to write about it! This weekend we went to Covington Tennessee to visit my husbands family. We had a wonderful time together. It was wonderful to see three generations all together. I'll post pictures at the end so keep reading. Anyway as we were driving down we began to think on family activities from last year. It was at this very same time last year we went to Voddie Bachaham's family camp. So we pulled out the blackberry did a google search and found....they are doing another one! This year it will be in St Louis, last year it was in Corpus Christi, TX. We were so excited to know that we have not missed it. Dates are July 31-Aug3. Click the title to get all the information.

So here is my family camp promotion.....

We loved it! We loved it! We Loved It! Why because there were so many families who understood the importance of family. We as believers are called to change the world by the lives we live. The first step in doing so is our family. Husbands must be strong leaders of their homes. By strong I mean making every effort to lead in the word of God. "Going to Church" should not be the first and only time your family is instructed in the word of God. Fellowship with other believers should support what is already happening in your home. When you serve others your family should serve with you. If your not in that season of life then slow down and work on your family and in due time the Lord will allow to go out and change the world for His glory and His fame!

Family Camp is exactly what it says. We camp as a family. We don't send the kids away to kiddie camp while the adults get a break and others teach the kids. It is our responsibility to train and disciple our own children. Imagine if all believers had that same mindset. Our world would look different...the Hebrew children certainly understood the law. Why did that happen because of this verse right here.....Hear O Israel: The Lord our God the Lord is one. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command to you shall be unpon your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. Deuteronomy 6:4-7. Let's be found teaching our families the way of the Lord...not handing that great job to someone else.

Go to family camp 2009 and learn how to do this yourself!


Najee' teaching Nicollus to pose like the kids in WalMart magazines.

Nicollus doing his Walmart pose!

Three generations of Fletcher men! Phillip Nicollus, Phillip Demond, and Phillip Lee Fletcher



Attempt number 1!

Attempt number 2!

Nicolle and Phil finally getting our photo together!

HOMEMAKER MOMENTS!!!!

visit: http://www.homemakerchronicles.com


So many things to share where do I begin....
How did I fulfill my role as wife, mother, and worshipper of the True and Living God?

As wife I took time to look outside myself an view a disagreement with my husband from an outsiders perspective. I spend a lot of time counselling, mentoring, and walking other women through struggles and joys in their life. What I have found is that an outside perspective is usually much clearer and more accurate because it is not based out of emotion or personal baggage. So that is what I applied to my own life. I was able to understand why I felt the way I did, but I needed to evaluate the way my husband was feeling and why. As women we often take the "he doesn't understand, or he doesn't care about me" route. When more than likely he understands what he needs to and he cares above what we think. I know for my husband in particular he looks at the BIG, LLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNGGGGGG term picture. While I am pretty much the small (I want it now), and quickly picture. As a result I (with the power of the Holy Spirit) have and are choosing peace, and patience. I praise God for that....evidence of the work of Christ in my heart, mind, and soul.

As a mother I have decided to STOP NURSING MY CHILDREN! I have a 10, 8, and 7 year old. I cook all the food (most days), I clean all the rooms (most days), I wash all the laundry (most days), I clean my own car...van actually, and on occasion I do the yard work. Now as I read scripture there was a King who was 8! As I look at other countries kids are holding it down in labor. When I went to Tanzania, Africa there were children younger then mine carrying the five gallon bucket of water on their head. Now why are they able to do this and not mine? Oh, it is because of expectation. These children are expected to help in their home...in fact they have to. While I work to the bone and allow my children all kinds of freedom and privilege. This week I have STOPPED NURSING MY CHILDREN! Have you seen a woman breastfeeding a 4, 5, or even 6 year old? Trust me it happens and is completely ridiculous. There is some twisted fulfillment the mother gets out of that because there is not real need for the children to breastfeed at those ages. So it is with me. What twisted fulfillment am I getting out of nursing my children in regards to laboring around the home? Maybe the thought of I am really doing this, or some appreciation from them or others that I am freeing you and I will be SUPER CHRISTIAN MOMMA....who takes care of home, husband, and children. The thought of my husband and children not have to lift a finger around my house. Those thoughts are sinful, prideful, and arrogant. The reality is I do need them to help. Not just for me but to help them capable functioning adults, and children who are respectful and grateful, and know how to take care of things. I gave assignments, instructions, and I stepped back to watch. We also added this....You how when Jesus was on the cross and He cried out "It is finished", well that is a statement of a servant returning to the master that the job is complete. We talked about that and I explained that they need to follow Christ example and let me know when the job is done.

As a worshipper of the Most High God I really spent time seeking the Lord and being thankful for Christ on the cross! Christ was mangled for me! Christ took on my sin! Christ is in all ways wonderful. Words fail to express how thankful I am to God who revealed Himself through Jesus Christ. I Love HIM!

WALKING THROUGH OPEN DOORS AND THANKFUL FOR THE CLOSED DOOR!

Hey all! Last night we had dinner with Mr. Hustler, his momma boo, and his two children. It was a wonderful time. We listened and learned. We taught and educated! We encouraged in Christ and opened our home. The kids all played together very well. I was concerned about the dinner (as shallow as that seems). This a family who normally eats soul food. I don't cook soul food very often. My plan was for my mother to cook it but she was unavailable. So we had normal Fletcher food which they all enjoyed. The silly things we get stuck on?

We talked a lot about the depth of hurt each one has felt and is presently feeling. Boy oh, boy was it deep. Would you pray for salvation and deliverance for this family. That God would radically transform their lives into His image! Mr. Hustler is very intelligent and would be a mighty warrior for the Kingdom of Christ! Again please pray.


Also the other family that actually asked for us to counsel them. Has moved away! I talked to them on Friday of last week and they had moved out of the park to some city far away. I am happy to report they received what they were really looking for. I pray that the Lord would bring another to proclaim the good news of Christ to them right where they are.

Blessings!

HOMEMAKER MOMENTS!

It's Friday...time for the homemaker moments. Ladies don't forget to share your moments with others. I find it very encouraging to read how the Lord is working in your life to build your home. Lots of ideas come from these moments. You can click on title to go to Angie's blog the originator of Homemaker Moments!

Here are my moments...
This week was rough because I had to work through some really hard things with my children. Okay moms let be honest. You know how, we understand that our children are foolish, sinful, and will do things wrong in our mind. But in our heart we feel they can do no wrong? There was a situation an old one but I just found out about it. My kid was the rotten child. And I found out in front of another adult. Oh, how my heart sank to the ground! My child foolish...couldn't be...but it was! I was thankful that my child told the truth even with the knowlegde of consiquences. We have taught our children that we don't expect them to be perfect and we know from the starting block they will get it wrong. That is fine, but we encourage them to run to Jesus! Repent, Believe, and turn from sin then fall at the feet of Jesus. So here it was...the rubber hitting the road. Can I in this frustrating and disappointing moment display what we have taught?

Praise God! He gave me the strength to be firm, discipline, instruct, forgive, and love. I took that child to Christ. It was awesome at the end. Note, I said at the end, because getting to the end was really rough. My child said to me Christ is the only thing good in me. I thought okay you are on to something! Then I went on to share that you are correct. At the same time those who the Holy Spirit of God dwells in are made righteous and good. Child, you will error and fall short of God's glory daily. He knows that and choose you anyway. It is He who is perfect and He dwells in you, so rejoice and receive the forgiveness of God. Don't bind yourself with a bondage that was not given to you by God. This is how I talk to my kids. If they don't understand they will tell me but more often then not they get it. So the short version is that there was peace and restoration. My pride was crushed and that was a good thing.

On another note...
My daughters started a business with a friend. The daughter of Angie (homemaker chronicle lady). They are so excited and I am too. We have talked about all kinds of wonderful things. This was an awesome intro to home school for me. With this one concept we are able to cover math, economics, design, writing, advertising...the list goes on. We will showcase their work on the blog soon. They have decided to give 5% of their profit to help child in need of educational supplies. They came up with their own percentages and organization to give to. I thought it was wonderful. They are being responsible with finances. They report to one another their income and calculate the % and proper distribution. We have really spent quality time getting this off the ground. So get ready to order from Glamour Glare Jewels by NRN Jewelers. There work is awesome!

Finally...
My husband I are working on hard core open honest communication. Oh buddy! It is hard but we have greatly benefited from it. You know when you and your husband are discussing an issue and you both conclude the conversation but it isn't truly finished. We are going beyond that point. I mean really seeing the heart of matters..whether it be pride, selfishness, or misunderstnading. God is loving us through this process and again we are better for it!

Praise the Lord for His work in my home this week!