Being his Crown

Last week there was homework!  Make a comment on this site or on BlogFrog to share insight from the homework assignment!  Today's Being his Crown (FHM) will be hosted at homemaker chronicles. Click here to read what is on Angie's mind.  Don't forget to join in on the discussion at Blog Frog. 

Being his Crown!

This is an exciting adventure that the Homemaker Chronicler and I (The Vine Woman) are on. The Lord has laid a burden on our hearts for marriage. We are seeking to create an open forum where women can learn, grow and discuss the issues of marriage, not often spoke of. The heart of this ministry comes from Proverbs 12:4a "An excellent wife is the crown of her husband" and Proverbs 31:29 "Many have done excellently but you surpass them all". This whole effort is to help women embrace their identity in Christ and specifically concerning your husband.

Dear sister, you are the one your husband has chosen and there is NONE who can or will excel at being your man's woman. You are his crown so adorn yourself with truth, love, strength, dignity and unbridled passion for him to wear! You are “being his crown”!

This is how the partnership works. Every Friday The Vine Woman or Homemaker Chronicle will write a post or direct you to the others site. Homemaker will post the topic on her blog Monday for the upcoming Friday. You will then have the opportunity to partner in dialog as well. We are also in the blogfrog forum. Sign up (it’s free) and connect with us. We desire to hear from you. So let’s talk!

HOMEMAKER MOMENTS!!!!

visit: http://www.homemakerchronicles.com


So many things to share where do I begin....
How did I fulfill my role as wife, mother, and worshipper of the True and Living God?

As wife I took time to look outside myself an view a disagreement with my husband from an outsiders perspective. I spend a lot of time counselling, mentoring, and walking other women through struggles and joys in their life. What I have found is that an outside perspective is usually much clearer and more accurate because it is not based out of emotion or personal baggage. So that is what I applied to my own life. I was able to understand why I felt the way I did, but I needed to evaluate the way my husband was feeling and why. As women we often take the "he doesn't understand, or he doesn't care about me" route. When more than likely he understands what he needs to and he cares above what we think. I know for my husband in particular he looks at the BIG, LLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNGGGGGG term picture. While I am pretty much the small (I want it now), and quickly picture. As a result I (with the power of the Holy Spirit) have and are choosing peace, and patience. I praise God for that....evidence of the work of Christ in my heart, mind, and soul.

As a mother I have decided to STOP NURSING MY CHILDREN! I have a 10, 8, and 7 year old. I cook all the food (most days), I clean all the rooms (most days), I wash all the laundry (most days), I clean my own car...van actually, and on occasion I do the yard work. Now as I read scripture there was a King who was 8! As I look at other countries kids are holding it down in labor. When I went to Tanzania, Africa there were children younger then mine carrying the five gallon bucket of water on their head. Now why are they able to do this and not mine? Oh, it is because of expectation. These children are expected to help in their home...in fact they have to. While I work to the bone and allow my children all kinds of freedom and privilege. This week I have STOPPED NURSING MY CHILDREN! Have you seen a woman breastfeeding a 4, 5, or even 6 year old? Trust me it happens and is completely ridiculous. There is some twisted fulfillment the mother gets out of that because there is not real need for the children to breastfeed at those ages. So it is with me. What twisted fulfillment am I getting out of nursing my children in regards to laboring around the home? Maybe the thought of I am really doing this, or some appreciation from them or others that I am freeing you and I will be SUPER CHRISTIAN MOMMA....who takes care of home, husband, and children. The thought of my husband and children not have to lift a finger around my house. Those thoughts are sinful, prideful, and arrogant. The reality is I do need them to help. Not just for me but to help them capable functioning adults, and children who are respectful and grateful, and know how to take care of things. I gave assignments, instructions, and I stepped back to watch. We also added this....You how when Jesus was on the cross and He cried out "It is finished", well that is a statement of a servant returning to the master that the job is complete. We talked about that and I explained that they need to follow Christ example and let me know when the job is done.

As a worshipper of the Most High God I really spent time seeking the Lord and being thankful for Christ on the cross! Christ was mangled for me! Christ took on my sin! Christ is in all ways wonderful. Words fail to express how thankful I am to God who revealed Himself through Jesus Christ. I Love HIM!

Homemaker Moments

This homemaker moment is different from the others in the sense that my focus is not on how I was able to fulfill my role but how other mothers are fulfilling their role and beyond!

This week I experienced a very long birth. This month alone I assisted with three births two of them were scheduled for other months. Anyway, all that to say I am so grateful to God for allowing women to be all they need to be in their home and still have enough to bless someone else.

Here is my shout out! To HaleHole3, thanks for bringing cooked lasagna, and strawberry cake to my house, after a midweek birth. To the J.W., thanks for picking up my kids and hanging with them after school for a few hours. To Servingthesaints, thanks for teaching my kids to make strawberry preserves and praying for me during a difficult labor. Finally to my Homemaker Chronicle, thanks for holding it down in prayer, dinners, and sanity contacts!

I would be remiss if I did not give it up to the super duper woman, Impressions that Last! This is my mother who lives next door and is always there. Thanks for taking care of my family from the "sun up to sun down Saturday birth". I couldn't stop laughing as my mother reported, "your family has been at my house all day they don't know what to do without you." I left the house for this birth at 6:00am and returned at 10:00p.m or so. As I was driving home and talking to my mother, thinking they had gone home by now (surely)....No they were still next door at her house hanging, eating her food, watching her television, and whatever else they needed. This was not the first and won't be the last time I am certain of that fact!So again thank you momma!

Homemakers all over the world this goes out to you! You spend many days and nights building your home, your husband, and your children. Most times this includes a to do list that is out of this world. Yet, some how it all gets done, or at least the most important of those things gets done. I love you sister in the Lord and I know without a doubt that our Father in Heaven loves you even more than I ever could! Continue to walk in the grace afforded to you by our GREAT GOD AND KING! Serve well and strive for excellence in all you say and do, making sure that above all else He is satisfied with your act of service to HIM!

HOMEMAKER MOMENT!

It has been weeks since I have posted a homemaker moment. So with great joy and excitement I am searching for a moment to share with you. oh I remember a very cool moment! Here goes....

It was one Sunday night we were just hang out in our bedroom with the kids. I had a talk with my daughter about puberty earlier that day. It was awesome, she was very receptive to the conversation. I have to set this up in order for you to understand the family dynamic. In instructing my daughter about the days ahead (specifically menstrual cycle) we needed create a training drill. This was learned by all the drills and field time from the military. Holla, if you know what I am talking about (military wives). I gave her a pad and showed her how to use it. We actually put it on and let her wear it around and I would later teach her how to discard. Discarding is a very important step, please instruct your girl carefully!

Now to the family conversation.

Have you ever wondered what your children are actually learning from you? Well, I have. That night we asked them what they see in us.

My question was from three specific marriages whose would you like yours to be like and why? Our son was the first to answer. He said, "Yours because there is lots of affection." Then my oldest daughter chimed in with the same response. Our youngest daughter said, "Yours because I see lots of respect." Can you say WOW! I was relieved, thankful, blessed and amazed! I mean you want your children to get the message you are instilling, but you don't really know if they are getting it. So it was awesome to hear them articulate in their own words.

"We ask what nice or mean things do you hear dad say about mom, and vice versa?" Our son, first responder once again, states "Dad is always saying that I have the hottest wife and that moms a fox and stuff." The youngest states, "Dad calls you his queen." Of course that was what both girls identified with. Najee' is striving to overthrow me by calling herself a queen or at least one in training. Nichelle, however fully understands that she doesn't get the title queen until we find the king God created her for. What does mom say nice about dad? The room went silent! :0 Nichelle goes into how mom is always doing something nice, like cooking, cleaning, helping with homework, grocery shopping, going to the school, giving birth with people and taking care of everyone.

It was funny how she hit the nail right on the head. In regards to my family I am all about getting the job done. Clearly that has shown up as well. I have been seeking the Lord about opening my mouth with praise more often towards my husband and my children. I don't desire them to be only workers.

Anyway, then we start talking about what they would like to be and or do as adults. Nicollus says, "I want to preach the gospel in a mobile home like dad." Then all of a sudden my daughter walks out of our bathroom and announces that she took off her pad and put on a new one! Phil looks at me and I look at him. Then he says, "You forgot a few details!" In that moment I realize she is using material that I will actually need! "Hold up little sister! First you don't announce your business, second you don't get to keep putting on new pads because I will need them." I responded. With a look of sorrow she says, "okay". However that was just after she put her finger over her mouth and said, "shhhhhhh" to everyone in the room as a sign of privacy.

If that was not funny enough, we continue talking. Nicollus starts preaching a sermon about how the man has to work to provide for his family. The wife and children get to enjoy the benefits of the mans labor. Then it goes on and on. I am praying now for the mobile park my son leads...they are in for some long winded sermons!

All that to say, by the grace of God we are doing our job as parents. I can't boast in anything but Christ. He is working all these things in us as well as our children. I know the homemaker moments are to "brag on yourself" but in this case I really can't. It is by God's grace ALONE that all this is taking place. I am sure we all understand that as we post our homemaker moments but I thought I'd make that statement in the event someone thought this was my or Phil's wonderful parenting.

I hope this encourages you as moms and even dads to seek the wisdom of God in all things. Remember those little people that live in your home are watching and absorbing everything. Pray they absorb Christ in the end!

Homemaker Moment (a little late!)

This is a really cool moment. My youngest daughter is a READER! She loves books. The school was having a book fair. Of course she wanted books, books and more books. Well, our budget was....you must read and re-read the books you already have because we don't have book money right now. I just flat out told her I would love to buy you books but we can't right now. She was fine with that and seemed to move on (well a little). I told here that during parent teacher conference I would be more than happy to walk her through the fair so she could look at the books, but again there was no budget for purchasing books.

So, I was in a conference with Nicollus' teacher. Just towards the end Nichelle bust out her glamour glare jewels jewelry sets and ask the teacher would she like to buy some. Now understand I met my children at school (they did not come home). Which meant she packed up all her jewelry sets and brought them to school with the intent on selling during conference time. WOW! She sold two full sets to two different teachers (during my conference times) made $16.00 and purchased the books she wanted from the book fair and gave money to her brother and sister! Can you say oh my goodness!

Allow me to help you feel this like I did. I was totally unaware that she was planning this. I am not really sure her siblings knew. This is my 7 year old! She came up with this whole plan all alone. I am just in awe!

After she was able to purchase the books she wanted and gave to her siblings. I praised her for sharing with them and for her entrepreneur skills. We brought it home by acknowledging the Lord's provision amidst it all. God gave her the wisdom, He gave the teachers the money (right amount in cash in their purses...I never carry cash even if I do have money), and God gave them the heart to spend it on her business. Praise the Lord...He provides even for the littlest of these.

Last thing, Nichelle the youngest has a talent for finding money outside. Well one day they wanted something. I told them to pray that we find $5 outside somewhere. So they all prayed and we did not find anything that day. But two days later we went to Kroger. While in the store with the girls trying to find the best deal on cereal that the family likes I looked down and saw a coupon. The coupon was for a free box of Special K 16.9oz (Nichelle's favorite that I never buy because is cost $5). We usually eat that cereal when my mother buys it. She lives next door so we know when she has it. ;) Anyway, there we were in the store with a free coupon for cereal that cost just over $5. Next lesson God may not provide what we want the way we want it and when we want it...but He will show up! When He does it will be for HIS glory, and it will unmistakeably be HIM! Praise God!

Another Homemaker Moment!

This homemaker moment is less about what a great job I have done and more about how wonderful my husband is. On Wednesday I received a phone call from a laboring client. Now, Wednesday evenings is our official date night. Not much ever interrupts that time! Back to the phone call on Wednesday night! I thought seriously...your not due until March! I know, I know I can't predict or plan such things.

Phil and I continued with our date (kind of). I was on the phone with the woman in labor, my doula partner, and the Birth Works Director (Nurse Midwife). WHAT A DATE NIGHT!? My husband was clearly bothered by the whole situation. He understood my obligation, but again this has not happened on one of our date nights EVER!

Long story short. We wrapped our date up pretty quickly, picked up our kids from AWANA, and off I was to be with the laboring momma. It turned out to be a false alarm but good we went to the hospital the baby's heart rate was high and the momma was dehydrated. So at around 1:30A.M I arrived home from a thirty minute drive from the hospital.

As I walked in the door, much to my surprise all the laundry was neatly folded and organized by person and or location. The dishes were clean and put away and my whole house was sound asleep. That was a homemaker moment!

My moment is to simply say thank you to my husband (PUBLICLY)! The time spent cleaning and organizing the house during a difficult situation was greatly appreciated! I will build my home by using the word thank you more often!

I learned this from the experience. Our service to one another speaks to the glory of God. In my husbands service to me I was able to see how Christ serves and loves His bride even when her attention is divided. Christ will pursue His bride even when other things (even good things) distract her. That pursuit will always bring her back to Him! Thank you Lord for making yourself known to me in this way through my husband!

I Love You....My King


Queen

INTRODUCING...GLAMOUR GLARE JEWELS!

This is my homemaker moment for this week! I am displaying my daughters business...Glamour Glare Jewels. If you would like to purchase a jewelry set that is shown below...please leave a comment or email the girls directly at glamourglarejewels@gmail.com This is a business owned and operated by three young christian girls. They have chosen to donate 5% of all profits to children in need of school supplies. We forget that children are in need of those supplies year round. Nichelle has been on a mission for sometime to help children with their crayon supplies. Last year (kindergarten) she would ask me week after week to purchase crayons. I couldn't for the life of me understand how she was going through so many boxes of crayons. Well I found later that she was giving them away to children who broke theirs, had worn them down, or had parents who couldn't afford to buy them. This year their business will help aid other children with crayons, paper, pencils, notebooks etc. So consider helping their business get off the ground.

Bracelet and Earring Set $5.00


Necklace $6.00 with Earrings $8.00



Girls Pink Dragonfly bracelet $3.00



(1) Bracelet and Earrings Set $5.00 (2)Bracelet and Earrings $8.00


Bracelet $3.00


Necklace $6.00


Necklace and Bracelet (Kids Size) $6.00



We are also able to accept credit cards! I mean it is 2009 RIGHT!
THANKS!

HOMEMAKER MOMENTS!

It's Friday...time for the homemaker moments. Ladies don't forget to share your moments with others. I find it very encouraging to read how the Lord is working in your life to build your home. Lots of ideas come from these moments. You can click on title to go to Angie's blog the originator of Homemaker Moments!

Here are my moments...
This week was rough because I had to work through some really hard things with my children. Okay moms let be honest. You know how, we understand that our children are foolish, sinful, and will do things wrong in our mind. But in our heart we feel they can do no wrong? There was a situation an old one but I just found out about it. My kid was the rotten child. And I found out in front of another adult. Oh, how my heart sank to the ground! My child foolish...couldn't be...but it was! I was thankful that my child told the truth even with the knowlegde of consiquences. We have taught our children that we don't expect them to be perfect and we know from the starting block they will get it wrong. That is fine, but we encourage them to run to Jesus! Repent, Believe, and turn from sin then fall at the feet of Jesus. So here it was...the rubber hitting the road. Can I in this frustrating and disappointing moment display what we have taught?

Praise God! He gave me the strength to be firm, discipline, instruct, forgive, and love. I took that child to Christ. It was awesome at the end. Note, I said at the end, because getting to the end was really rough. My child said to me Christ is the only thing good in me. I thought okay you are on to something! Then I went on to share that you are correct. At the same time those who the Holy Spirit of God dwells in are made righteous and good. Child, you will error and fall short of God's glory daily. He knows that and choose you anyway. It is He who is perfect and He dwells in you, so rejoice and receive the forgiveness of God. Don't bind yourself with a bondage that was not given to you by God. This is how I talk to my kids. If they don't understand they will tell me but more often then not they get it. So the short version is that there was peace and restoration. My pride was crushed and that was a good thing.

On another note...
My daughters started a business with a friend. The daughter of Angie (homemaker chronicle lady). They are so excited and I am too. We have talked about all kinds of wonderful things. This was an awesome intro to home school for me. With this one concept we are able to cover math, economics, design, writing, advertising...the list goes on. We will showcase their work on the blog soon. They have decided to give 5% of their profit to help child in need of educational supplies. They came up with their own percentages and organization to give to. I thought it was wonderful. They are being responsible with finances. They report to one another their income and calculate the % and proper distribution. We have really spent quality time getting this off the ground. So get ready to order from Glamour Glare Jewels by NRN Jewelers. There work is awesome!

Finally...
My husband I are working on hard core open honest communication. Oh buddy! It is hard but we have greatly benefited from it. You know when you and your husband are discussing an issue and you both conclude the conversation but it isn't truly finished. We are going beyond that point. I mean really seeing the heart of matters..whether it be pride, selfishness, or misunderstnading. God is loving us through this process and again we are better for it!

Praise the Lord for His work in my home this week!

The Heart of My Son!

Angie's Page http://www.homemakerchronicles.com/blog/


I am so thankful to be able to share this homemaker moment. I had the opportunity to hear the heart of my son. He was accused of physically hurting another child. As soon as my child's name was mentioned in relation to hurting another child Dad when off! I have found myself doing the exact same thing on other occasions. Mainly because we don't expect our children (son in particular) to respond in seemingly harsh ways.

Long story short, after all was said and done I went in to talk to our son. I simply told him to tell me what happened. He really did not get a chance to do that before. So reluctantly he did. After explaining I understood why it happened. Then I said what else is going on. He slowly poured his heart out. I am so thankful! It was wonderful to actually listen to his heart and understand where he is. We need to make more room for times like these.

As parents we are often "the mouth" and seldom "the ear". I would encourage all to listen to the heart of your child. To actually close your mouth and open your ear. You may hear Christ speak in your ear through the mouth of your child!

HOMEMAKER MOMENTS

IT'S FRIDAY!

Homemaker Moments DAY!

It is odd but this week I have not felt wise or homemakery (might not be a word). I would imagine there was something said or done to build up my home...but nothing that just pops out at me. So i will attempt to share with you a few things that i hope you will find encouraging and homemaker ish!

I will follow Angie's lead and share a story about my son. Yesterday was a normal day but when I make dinner if my kids don't have a specific task they will crowd me in the kitchen and sneak samples of the food I'm cooking...they learned that horrible behavior from their DADDY! Anyway the girls were working as a team on homework so they could finish playing dolls (that were all over the living room floor) and Nicollus was just hanging. So I thought what a wonderful time to have him join me in making dinner. We made a awesome salad with all kinds of vegetables. He would cut a few things and I would cut something else. He really enjoyed making dinner and it was simple. Some cut up chicken with lettuce, veggies and of course strawberries with balsamic vinegar GREAT! Dinner was wonderful and all the compliments when to Nicollus and I. We were a great team.



Okay I can remember one more thing. We are striving to make our home fragranced with a sweet aroma of praise and worship unto God. What that means is we take every opportunity to speak of Christ and how in our everyday lives we see the work of GOD!

Okay so Tuesday night Phil said let just do some singing tonight with the kids. He asked me to find a scripture to read and so I did.

Well during singing time, it was awesome our kids were singing with joy and excitement, but here is the funny part. One of the kids were snuggled under my arm but the other two were hanging upside down, clapping, jumping it looked like a circus. They were casually enjoying the singing to the Lord. I took great delight in that. We have taught our children to be free and express their hearts to the Living God! So that was awesome.


So that was my couple of homemakers moments this week!

HOMEMAKER MOMENT!

My Homemaker Moment! I love what Angie is doing on her blog to encourage women to examine their life and see how the Lord is using us as wives and mothers in a huge way for His Glory. What an awesome and exciting adventure. So I have chosen to take the ride. Every Friday we are encouraged to post something that took place during that week that was a fulfillment of our God given roles as wife, mother, woman, and or believer! So here are my few stories, I couldn’t just do one! 

The first was on Monday night. A few women gathered at my home for pray (specifically for our husbands (Wifes in Touch)). During the prayer time Phil (my husband) was home hanging out and entertaining our children. After the prayer time the women come out to find Phil making bracelets for the girls. It was a wonderful site, mostly because my husband is NOT a big fan of the artsy craftsy world. So that night at bed time as I tucked in the girls, “I asked them what they thought about daddy making those bracelets?” I saw both of the girls eyes light up, “It was really cool that dad would make bracelets because he doesn’t really do that kind of stuff!” So no beans about it we all understand how amazing it was for dad to do that. Here was the fulfilling of the role. I shared with the girls about their Heavenly Father. “It was wonderful, cool, and amazing to see dad make those bracelets for you because he loves you and cares for you. But did you know that your Heavenly Father is a million times more wonderful, cool and amazing then dad. The love of your Heavenly Father is greater than all the love dad could ever think or imagine. That love, is the coolest love ever and none can compare!” They were so excited and truly grasped the concept of a love greater than the amazing natural dad…God the Father! SO how was my role fulfilled? In Titus 2:4 love their children, 1 Corinthians 8:6 yet there is one God, the Father, from whom are all things and for whom we exist, and one Lord, Jesus Christ, though whom are all things and through whom we exist, Deut. 6:7 You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down and when you rise. That was my opportunity to bring Glory to Christ and teaching my daughters the truth that dad will fail as much as he loves you, Your Heavenly Father is better! It also releases Phil from unreasonable expectations from our daughters.

The second was Tuesday night. I was able to give something to my husband that he truly delights in and doesn’t come very often. This was role fulfilling because God’s word teaches us to love our husbands again Titus 2:4 love their husband.
The third was on Tuesday as well. I was scheduled to teach a women’s bible study but my husband was going to be running late. If you don’t already know we next door to my parents. Phil and I had planned for his late schedule by having the kids go next door until he arrived. However one of my girls was really struggling with me leaving and wanting me to wait until dad came home. So I weighed it out and chose to stay home because it was more loving and more impactful for me to stay home then to teach women who know the bible more about it. Phil came home in enough time and I was still able to teach and my daughter saw love in action.